Do you agree with the following statement? Good teachers are more important to a child's development than good parents. Use specific details to support your argument.

#teachers #child #development #parents #support #argument

At all times,

children

spend a lot of

time

studying at

school

, while interacting with

teachers

Thus

, some people believe that excellent

teachers

can contribute to

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

children

's development more than excellent

parents

However

, I would disagree with

this

opinion and will give more details about it.

First

of all,

parents

are the people who will stay together with their

child

Fix the agreement mistake

children

show examples

till they become adults. During

this

long period of

time

parents

educate

children

, especially while

children

are very young. Caregivers not only teach the

right

way of behaviour and manners

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

but

also

nourish the

right

values and

attitude

Fix the agreement mistake

attitudes

show examples

for their

kid

Fix the agreement mistake

kids

show examples

. Meanwhile, at

school

teachers

are not focusing that much on each

children

Change to a singular noun

child

show examples

and their progress

Change preposition

show examples

thinking.

For example

, in my country's elementary schools, there are no subjects

such

as etiquette or

right

values or even self-care. The classrooms are crowded,

thus

, the main goal for the teacher is to present their lecture.

Therefore

, the biggest influence on

children

's development comes from

parents

Secondly

, at

school

children

mostly are taught

science related

Add a hyphen

science-related

show examples

subjects or arts. These subjects rarely affect

child's

Correct article usage

a child's

show examples

thinking or

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

outlook towards

daily

Correct article usage

the daily

show examples

world's

Change noun form

world

show examples

life, friendships or

Correct your spelling

interactions

interation

Correct your spelling

interaction

interactions

with different people.

Consequently

child

Add an article

the child

a child

show examples

is only expanding knowledge or gaining

skills

Change preposition

show examples

calculating, writing,

reading

Correct word choice

and reading

show examples

. Those

skills

can definitely be taught by

parents

at home.

Moreover

children

spend only half of the day at

school

and the rest of the

time

can be dedicated to

face to face

Add a hyphen

face-to-face

show examples

communication and some soft-

skills

learning from

parents

. To summarize, in my opinion, great

parents

are more important than

teachers

for

child's

Correct article usage

a child's

show examples

development, because

children

spend the most

time

with caregivers, who can not only develop

child

's hard

skills

such

as maths, reading or writing, but as well as some soft

skills

, like well manners, behaviour,

right

values pack. I believe

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

that

parents

are the most honest and superior

teachers

, affecting and developing

child's

Correct article usage

a child's

show examples

brain.

Submitted by ieva.k.kov on Thu Aug 04 2022

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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11Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
8Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
21Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

316 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Do you agree with the following statement? Good teachers are more important to a child's development than good parents. Use specific details to support your argument.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

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