Young people in the modern world seem to have more power and influence than any previous young generation. Why is this the case? What impact does this have on the relationship between old and young people?

#people #world #power #influence #generation #case #impact #relationship

In modern society, teenagers became more influential than any previous generation. Their opinions are possibly heard by the public,

even

Correct word choice

and even

show examples

create

Wrong verb form

creating

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the

Correct article usage

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trend in our society. In my opinion, one of the reasons is the rising of the internet and social publishing dominating our daily life. Most

the

Correct article usage

apply

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young

people

are really into social

media

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

and realized how to manage their image on Instagram or Twitter. Some of them are followed by the public, with astonishing subscribers, their

voice

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voices

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are even stronger than traditional

media

. Abundant

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apply

show examples

exposure made

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

young

people

have

Unnecessary verb

apply

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more opportunities to influence the public.

As a result

, the young

people

took

advantages

Fix the agreement mistake

advantage

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of the internet result in their

Correct your spelling

existence

existenece

Correct your spelling

existence

was hard to ignore.

However

, the transformation in

media

caused teenagers to have

chance

Correct article usage

a chance

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to speak out their ideas may form a gap between elderly folk and young

people

. Most

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apply

show examples

Add an article

the elder

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elder

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elders

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who

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

were

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was

show examples

used to

watch

Wrong verb form

watching

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paper news and television

instead

of social

media

. It took a lot of time for them to get familiar with

mobile

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a mobile

the mobile

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device

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devices

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. Not

mention

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to mention

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to use

this

gadget to show themselves and have an impact on others. As a consequence, some elders can't understand the importance of teenagers because the

media

over a period of 10 years changing rapidly. It may occur

misinderstanding

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misunderstanding

misunderstandings

and conflicts between different generations. As I see it, it is so common that technology is improving and making our life different. Everyone would get older and have

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apply

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shock

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shocked

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with the new technology someday, it would be better to learn the latest technology and be humble

Change preposition

about

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every single change in our society.

Submitted by dona32939 on Thu Aug 04 2022

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Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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4Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
26Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

268 words

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Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Young people in the modern world seem to have more power and influence than any previous young generation. Why is this the case? What impact does this have on the relationship between old and young people?

Fully explain your ideas

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Students at schools and universities learn far more by lessons with their teachers compared to other sources (e.g. television, the Internet). Do you agree or disagree?

All children should study a foreign language in school, starting in the earliest grades. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Many museums and historical sites are mainly visited by tourists but not local people. Why is this the case and what can be done to attract more local people to visit these places?

Many governments think that economic progress is their most important goal. Some people, however, think that other types of progress are equally important for a country. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

The cities and towns all over the world the high volume of traffic is problem what are the causes of this and what actions can be taken to solve this problem.