IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

In many countries today, the eating habits and lifestyle of people are different from those of previous generations. Some people say this has had a negative effect on their health. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

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In
this
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 modern world majority of things have been changed through generations.
Therefore
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, lifestyle and
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
eating habits have become different.
Thus
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, some
people
Use synonyms
 have an idea that those different ways of eating harm their
health
Use synonyms
.
This
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 essay will discuss some possible reasons and will provide my opinion on
this
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 statement.
To begin
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 with, between earlier generations and present
people
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, there is a huge difference in many things. Due to the fact, that in the past humans did a
lot
Add the preposition
oflot
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physics\al
Correct your spelling
physical
 activity.
Therefore
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, their
health
Use synonyms
Correct your spelling
required
requires
requaried
Correct your spelling
requires
strong food with more calories. That kind of meal takes time to prepare it.
In contrast
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, now
people
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 rely on the internet. Individuals have started to work and study
thoughout
Correct your spelling
throughout
 the networking system. Definitely, at present
people
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 eat
quick
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quickly
show examples
 prepared meals
such
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 as junk
foods
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,
fast
Correct word choice
and fast
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foods
Use synonyms
, to save time. Those
foods
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 have a bad influence on
health
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 and they may be one of the causes of serious diseases
such
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 as obesity and
canser
Correct your spelling
cancer
.
For example
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, in the USA, 66% of
Correct article usage
the populations
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populations
Fix the agreement mistake
population
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 are victims of fatting, because of fast
foods
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. Following the statement, nowadays advertising is a major influencer of
health
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 problems. As everybody knows, in
averts
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avert
show examples
people
Use synonyms
 use
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
fake
products
Correct the article-noun agreement
product
show examples
 to film the food in good quality. Without a doubt, they make
Correct your spelling
viewers
viewrs
Correct your spelling
viewers
 eat it right now. As fast
foods
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 do not require more time, they are made of not fresh products.
However
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, elderly
people
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 did not use to believe in
Correct your spelling
advertising
adverising
Correct your spelling
advertising
 and in their visual
foods
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. From personal
Correct your spelling
experience
exeperince
Correct your spelling
experience
, the hamburgers on tv
was
Change the verb form
were
show examples
 not as same as in real life. To conclude, the internet is a significant
reasons
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reason
show examples
 to change the eating habits of young individuals. I strongly believe that it treats
negatively
Correct pronoun usage
me negatively
show examples
.

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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