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Writing Samples
Band 7.5

young people who commit crimes should be treated the same as adults by the authorities. to what extend do you agree or dis agree?

#people #crimes #adults #authorities #dis
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Nowadays, the young commit serious
crimes
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 as adults. In the following, some
people
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 think that the court should apply the same verdict as mature
people
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 to young
people
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. I disagree with
this
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 opinion and I believe the youth need to be treated differently. One of the reasons why the government should not apply the same punishment to teenagers is that they are too naive to fully understand the crime's dire consequences. To elaborate, all young
people
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 need time to get mentally mature enough to wisely think about their decisions.
For example
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, the youth maybe do some risky behaviour to just get attention.
As a result
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, they are not literally capable of taking responsibility without the supervision of their parents, so their
crimes
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 should evaluate in separate courts
where
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that
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 have particular laws for teenagers. Another vital reason is that sending young
people
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 to a prison where adult criminals are there, not only can lead them to commit terrible
crimes
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 in the future, but
also
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 they catch serious mental disorders,
such
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 as mania that are not will eliminate from their lives with ease.
Thus
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, they need an exceptional boarding school where they can learn about catastrophic outcomes of
crimes
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 and study as ordinary persons except that they need to be under the supervision of professional psychologists, so they can make the right decision in the future. In conclusion, I strongly contend that teenagers should not have the same court system for their
crimes
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 as adults, because they are not mentally grown-up and prison is not for a teenager, they should study at school.
Submitted by parimelik on

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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