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Writing Samples
Band 2.5

Some children receive almost no encouragement from their parents regarding their performance at school, while other children receive too much pressure from their over enthusiastic parents which can have a negative impact on the child.

#children #encouragement #parents #performance #school #pressure #impact #child
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To begin
 with,
parent’s
Change noun form
parents
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 exerts pressure on their
children
Change noun form
children's
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 performance in school because
of
Change preposition
apply
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the amount they spend on their tuition fee makes them have certain expectations concerning their performance in school.
Secondly
, parents usually make
a
Correct article usage
the
show examples
 mistake of comparing their
children
 with other
children
 which
is
Change the verb form
are
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 not appropriate and fair enough
on
Change preposition
for
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 the
child
.
This
 factor of comparison
as
Correct your spelling
has
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 a negative impact on the
child
 , the
child
 begins to feel inferior and their
self esteem
Add a hyphen
self-esteem
show examples
 will be lost.
Furthermore
, I believe that parents have a vital responsibility to play in their
child
’s performance
such
 as constantly getting involved in the courses they do, taking note of their
weakness
Fix the agreement mistake
weaknesses
show examples
, and
also
 encouraging them to do better
boost
Fix the infinitive
to boost
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 their
self confidence
Add a hyphen
self-confidence
show examples
, and zeal to perform well In conclusion, parents
exerts
Change the verb form
exert
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 pressure on their
children
 because it is indeed a joy to every parent to see their
child
 do better than them, and
also
 to maintain their reputation in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
society.
Submitted by agozie2018 on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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