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Band 4.5

Should the government fund the education and healthcare system? What is your opinion?

#government #fund #education #healthcare #system
Public
services
 which include
education
 and
health
care
 are
major
Add an article
a major
the major
show examples
determinant
Fix the agreement mistake
determinants
show examples
 of
standard
Correct article usage
the standard
show examples
 of living in any society. It is agreed that
government
 should
fund
education
 and the
health
 sector.
This
 essay will analyse how
this
 will give equal access
of
Change preposition
for
show examples
 citizens to good
education
 and
health
care
, as well as serve as an avenue for revenue generation.
Firstly
,
development
Correct article usage
the development
show examples
 of
health
 and
education
 by the authorities
enable
Correct subject-verb agreement
enables
show examples
 access to equal and quality
services
 in
this
education
 and
health
 sectors.
For instance
, it is widely known that most poor
citizen
Fix the agreement mistake
citizens
show examples
 cannot afford good
health
care
 in private
health
 facilities and quality
education
 in
non
Add a hyphen
non-government
show examples
government
 institutions. Funding of
this sectors
Change the determiner
this sector
these sectors
show examples
 by
government
Add an article
the government
show examples
 will reduce the social gap in accessing
health
care
 and
education
 between the economic classes in the society and
also
 improve the standard of living of the people.
Therefore
, it is clear the
government
 should
fund
 public
services
Secondly
, funding
education
 and
health
care
has
Change the verb form
have
show examples
 a good economic impact. Because people will pay for accessing
this
Correct determiner usage
these
show examples
services
 in
this
Correct determiner usage
these
show examples
 facilities, revenue
are being generate
Change the verb form
are being generated
are generating
show examples
 and
thus
 improving the economic status of the community.
For example
, About
2.5billion
Correct article usage
a 2.5billion
show examples
 pounds was generated by oxford university in 2021.
This
is
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
money generated can be used
in
Change preposition
to
show examples
further
development
Correct article usage
the development
show examples
 of both
education
Correct article usage
the education
show examples
 and
health
 sector to the world standard and
also
fund
 other public
services
.
Thus
 it becomes apparent the authorities should
fund
education
 and
health
care
. In summary, funding of public
services
 by
government
Add an article
the government
show examples
 gives equal access to quality
services
 and
help
Correct subject-verb agreement
helps
show examples
 to generate income. It is
therefore
 agreed that authorities should
fund
education
 and
health
Correct article usage
the health
show examples
care
 system.
Submitted by emmyemark on

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Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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