Nowadays, a growing number of people with health problems are trying alternative medicines and treatments instead of visiting their usual doctor. DO you think this is a positive or negative development? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

In the present world, there is an ongoing debate regarding
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
patients
’ treatment. There are a huge number of individuals who suffer from health issues
are
Correct pronoun usage
who are
show examples
endeavoring
Change the spelling
endeavouring
show examples
different medications and cures rather than going to the doctor.
Although
there are some benefits of
alternative
medicines and
treatments
, I would argue that there are far more drawbacks. The main advantage of different
treatments
is less time-consuming.
This
is because the sufferers do not need to spend their time
on
Change preposition
apply
show examples
checking up by
Add an article
a specialist
show examples
specialist
Fix the agreement mistake
specialists
show examples
in the clinic.
On the contrary
,
patients
can take herbal medicines to treat themselves without wasting time in the clinic.
For
example
Add a comma
,example
show examples
my gran mother was involved
in
Change preposition
with
show examples
a terrible headache, and she drank
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
herbal drinking
instead
of checking up by
doctor
Add an article
the doctor
a doctor
show examples
, so
patients
can invest their time in other activities.
In addition
, the cost of
specialist
Fix the agreement mistake
specialists
show examples
would be high. The reason why some
patients
prefer to rely on
alternative
treatments
is
this
method may take less charge due to the fact that using
alternative
medication
Fix the agreement mistake
medications
show examples
like herbal drugs can be affordable. Despite the positives mentioned above, I believe that
alternative
treatments
are a negative development for various reasons.
First
of all,
Alternative
methods are not often reliable. It means that
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
therapists often have no
any
Correct quantifier usage
apply
show examples
medical degree to treat the
patients
,
hence
it is highly likely that the sufferers face serious damage by
incorrect
Add an article
the incorrect
show examples
diagnosis.
For example
,
according to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
a survey conducted at Cambridge University shows that the rate of
patients
death who make an unconscious effort
alternative
Change preposition
to alternative
show examples
medicines have been increasing
than
Change preposition
to
show examples
consulting
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
doctors. Provided that
patients
check up
Add a hyphen
check-up
show examples
by the doctors, they will be more assured. As a consequence, going to the doctors can decrease
patient’s
Correct article usage
the patient’s
show examples
tension because of scientific treatment rather than
alternative
treatments
such
as acupuncture. In conclusion, while I recognize the possible advantages of different
treatments
, I consider it to be a negative development overall.
Submitted by shokoohghavami on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • alternative medicines
  • treatments
  • positive development
  • negative development
  • health problems
  • usual doctor
  • access
  • personalized approach
  • holistic well-being
  • lack of regulation
  • evidence-based research
  • proper medical treatment
What to do next:
Look at other essays: