The government should control the amount of violence in films and on television in order to control violent crimes in society. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this action?

#government #control #amount #violence #films #television #crimes #society #action

It's sometimes argued that the exposure to a large number of

violence

in media like films and tv shows

are

Correct subject-verb agreement

show examples

supposed to be limited by the government in order to reduce the violent

crimes

in society . As for me, I totally agree with

this

point. On the one hand,manipulating videos and tv programs which contain violent imagery is an efficient

way

to prevent youngsters from stimulating. Because their word view hasn't been formed

competely

Correct your spelling

completely

Correct word choice

apply

show examples

they are more easily to be affected by media. They may recognize

violence

as an acceptable

way

of playing so they

are

Unnecessary verb

apply

show examples

intend to stimulate .

For example

, many pupils are been on watching "the pleasant and grey wolf " which involves stabbing ,

punching

Correct word choice

and punching

show examples

and

then

they imitate

to hurt

Change the verb form

hurting

show examples

others. But acting in

this

way

usually

have

Correct subject-verb agreement

has

show examples

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

serious Consequence .

Therefore

, decreasing

Replace the word

violent

show examples

violence

images is an important

way

to avoid situations that

mimicing

Correct your spelling

mimicking

. On the

Correct your spelling

other

othe

Correct your spelling

other

hand, It

also

can help

Add an article

the authority

show examples

authority

Fix the agreement mistake

authorities

show examples

Fix the infinitive

apply

show examples

prevent adults from committing

crimes

, especially

for

Change preposition

apply

show examples

someone who has

mental

Add an article

a mental

show examples

problem.

This kind

Fix the agreement mistake

These kinds

show examples

of people usually

lack

Change the verb form

lacks

show examples

empathy. Watching

gun fight

Correct your spelling

gunfight

show examples

shows may inspire them to Commit

crimes

For example

, The Joker is so weird and quite popular that many

crimes

have been associated with it.

Thus

, controlling

from

Change preposition

apply

show examples

the government is

Change the article

show examples

necessary method to impair

this

type of

crimes

Fix the agreement mistake

crime

show examples

. In conclusion, Watching TV shows and firms related to

violence

will put a negative effect on people's

behaviors

Change the spelling

behaviours

show examples

. The government has

responsibilities

Fix the agreement mistake

responsibility

show examples

to restrict them so as to decrease

crimes

Submitted by 元气少女鲁智深 on Thu Aug 11 2022

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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

firstly
secondly
thirdly
in additional
moreover
also
for example
for instance
therefore
however
although
even though
despite

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6Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
25Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

255 words

6.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

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Topic Vocabulary:

proliferation
normalize
desensitize
propensity
vulnerable populations
impressionable
emulate
stifles
creative freedom
censorship
slippery slope
media literacy
conclusively proven
socioeconomic conditions
mental health services
age ratings
content warnings
artistic freedom
informed choices

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The government should control the amount of violence in films and on television in order to control violent crimes in society. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this action?

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

There is no doubt that globalisation has benefited the world by bringing together people, business and nations. People who criticise it stand in the way of progress. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

With an increasing population communicating via the internet and text messaging, face-to-face communication will become a thing of the past. To what extent do you agree with this opinion?

With the development of social media, more and more youngsters are being allowed unsupervised access to the internet in order to meet and chat with friends which can lead to potentially dangerous situations. What solution can you suggest to deal with this problem?

SOME PEOPLE BELIEVE THAT SONG LYRICS WICH GLORIFY VIOLENCE AND CRIMINAL LIFESTYLES SHOULD BE BANNED. DISCUSS THE ADVANTAGES AND DISADVANTAGES OF SUCH A BAN.