IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

the developed world, average life expectancy is increasing. What problems will this cause for individuals and society? Suggest some measures that could be taken to reduce the impact of ageing populations.

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It is true that
people
Use synonyms
 in industrialised nations can expect to live longer than ever before.
Although
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 there will undoubtedly be some negative consequences of
this
Linking Words
 trend, societies can take steps to mitigate
these potential complication
Change the determiner
this potential complication
these potential complications
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. As
people
Use synonyms
 live longer and the populations of developed countries grow older, several related dilemmas can be anticipated. The main issue is that there will obviously be more
people
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 of retirement age who will be eligible to receive a pension. The proportion of younger, working women will be smaller, and governments will
therefore
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 receive less money in taxes in relation to the size of the population.
In other words
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, an ageing population will mean a greater tax burden for working men.
Further
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 pressures will include a rise in the demand for healthcare
,
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apply
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 and the fact young person will increasingly have to look after their elderly relatives. There are several actions that governments could take to solve the
complication
Fix the agreement mistake
complications
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 described above.
Firstly
Linking Words
, a simple solution would be to increase the retirement age for a working person, perhaps from 65 to 70. Nowadays,
people
Use synonyms
 of
this
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 age tend to be healthy enough to continue a productive working life. A second measure would be for governments to encourage immigration in order to increase the number of working women who pay taxes.
Finally
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, money from national budgets will need to be taken from other areas and spent on vital healthcare, accommodation and transport facilities for the rising numbers of older citizens. In conclusion, various measures can be taken to tackle the
dilemma
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dilemmas
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 that are certain to arise as the populations of countries grow older.

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Structure your answers in logical paragraphs

The easiest way to score well on the IELTS Task 2 writing portion is to structure your writing in a solid essay format.

A strong argument essay structure can be split up into 4 paragraphs, each containing 4 sentences (except the conclusion paragraph, which only contains 3 sentences).

Stick to this essay structure:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • average life expectancy
  • developed world
  • increase
  • individuals
  • society
  • personal goals
  • ambitions
  • quality of life
  • leisure
  • recreation
  • healthcare costs
  • challenges
  • healthcare system
  • ageing population
  • shortage
  • available workers
  • economy
  • retirement planning
  • healthy lifestyles
  • investing
  • social support systems
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