Some people believe that it is important to spend time developing a successful career. Others argue that it is more important to spend time with friends and family than at work. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#people #time #career #friends #work

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?

this

Linking Words

present era, it is found to be pretty difficult to balance activities. numerous

Change preposition

apply

show examples

are

Change the verb form

show examples

the opinion, that it is necessary to spend time on making a successful

career

Use synonyms

, while others argue that spending moments with closer one is essential rather than dealing with the work. In

this

Linking Words

essay, I will shed light on both views and will state my position.

To begin

Linking Words

with, those who believe investing time in a certain field is required have their reasons.

First

Linking Words

and foremost, putting in all your hard work and making your

career

Use synonyms

development your sole preference can help you to be stable in your life.

For instance

Linking Words

, medical students invest almost 5 years of their studies to make a beneficial

career

Use synonyms

As a result

Linking Words

, putting all the hardships in a particular department can help you develop

Remove the article

apply

show examples

successful professionalism.

Secondly

Linking Words

, if someone does not take their department seriously, they may end up leaving behind all the others.

Subsequently

Linking Words

, giving proper heed in your profession is required to survive soul.

However

Linking Words

, it frequently appears that

much

Correct quantifier usage

apply

show examples

prioritizing

the

Correct article usage

show examples

career

Use synonyms

can damage your personal life. Spending

the

Correct article usage

show examples

larger amount of time at the office has numerous harms.

For example

Linking Words

, if someone has an extremely tight work schedule

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

than

Replace the word

then

show examples

it appears to be extremely difficult for him to go out or to spend a quality

second

Linking Words

with his friends and family.

Consequently

Linking Words

, it can bring a lack of confidence and miscommunication between him and his loved

whoever

Correct pronoun usage

ones

show examples

Moreover

Linking Words

, in order to stay healthy and full of joyness, it is found by science, that a person must engage himself in events and parties with family. To conclude, in my opinion, a person needs to define the boundaries between his race development and leisure point activities with his loved ones. So that he can enjoy every single moment of life.

Submitted by mohammadkashif934 on Sat Aug 13 2022

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

12
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
9
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 9.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

306 words

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

Topic Vocabulary:

Professional fulfillment
Work-life balance
Financial stability
Emotional support
Societal contribution
Professional identity
Creating memories
Flexible working hours
Remote work
Setting boundaries
Prioritizing tasks
Productive workforce
Societal well-being
Cultural norms
Overall happiness
Foundational relationships

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

4.5
band
It is important to give children an opportunity to become independent and make decisions from early age. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
People hold distinctive opinions regarding a debate which is linked to youngsters should be self-sufficient or not. Some people claim that children should be independent and make their own decisions, while others think that kids should not be independent. In my opinion, athough there are plausible arguments to support this perspective, there are also reasons to disagree with it.
5
band
Formal examinations are the only effective way to assess a student's performance. Continual assessment, such as coursework and projects, is not a satisfactory way to do this. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?
Nowadays, formal examinations are a standard method of fairness in the evaluation process to evaluate the student’s performance. Formal examinations can evaluate skills such as learning and critical thinking in stressful situations but I totally disagree that formal examinations are the only effective way to assess a student’s performance because formal examinations cannot evaluate the creative skill and survival skill. I think continual assessment is the other effective way to assess a student's performance.
7.5
band
The growing number of overweight people is putting a strain on the healthcare system in an effort to deal with the health issues involved. Some people think that the best way to deal with this problem is to introduce more physical education lessons in the school curriculum. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Owing to the problems which a growing population of overweight people cause for the healthcare system, some people think that the key to solving these issues is to have more sport and exercise in schools. I completely agree that this is the best way to tackle the issue of deteriorating public health in relation to weight.
4.5
band
Young people are more likely to be involved in car accidents, therefore the legal driving age should be raised to 22 years old. Do you agree or disagree with this statement?
It is known that young adult lack attention while driving as they are not fully focused on the road, therefore this behaviour leads them into car accidents. In different nations the legal age of driving varies and even have different rules. I believe that not the driving age is the problem that causes car accidents,but most likely their reckless behaviour is one of the main factor for this statement.
5.5
band
Some university students want to learn about other subjects in addition to their main subjects. Others believe it is more important to give all their time and attention to studying for a qualification. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
Some people who does their higher education prefer to study additional areas outside the targeted one, while others think that it is more crucial to focus and spend time on a qualified goal. While investing all to the prefered degree can ease the money-making process later on, I believe learning more about other topics is better because it makes us more developed individuals.

Some people believe that it is important to spend time developing a successful career. Others argue that it is more important to spend time with friends and family than at work. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

It is important to give children an opportunity to become independent and make decisions from early age. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Formal examinations are the only effective way to assess a student's performance. Continual assessment, such as coursework and projects, is not a satisfactory way to do this. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Young people are more likely to be involved in car accidents, therefore the legal driving age should be raised to 22 years old. Do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Some university students want to learn about other subjects in addition to their main subjects. Others believe it is more important to give all their time and attention to studying for a qualification. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.