Some people believe that advertisements targeting children may have negative effects on them, and suggest banning such advertisements as a solution. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#people #advertisements #children #effects

Ever since the liberalization (losing of

restriction

Fix the agreement mistake

restrictions

show examples

) of media,

advertisements

have been its primary source of revenue.

Children

, who are in their formative years (early stages 0-8), are more likely to be influenced by

advertisements

than their elder counterparts (peer/equivalent) and are regularly targeted by marketers. It is agreed that

this

has negative effects on

children

thus

, shall be banned.

This

will be proven by looking at how, these

advertisements

can ultimately make

children

defiant, (resistant) and play a part in distracting

children

from academic activities.

To begin

, when

children

are exposed to an advertisement for products that their parents can’t afford to provide for them,

children

often resort (fall back on) to defying (disobey) both, their parents, and society.

For instance

, it is a known fact that most

children

, who go on to become rebels (rise in opposition), had been deprived (lack of) of their wishes for items that they don’t even need, nor can afford,

such

as elegant toys and expensive mobile phones.

This

shows that

advertisements

for certain kinds of products can lead

children

to develop delinquent tendencies (offence /crime).

Hence

, promotional material that targets

children

has more than its fair share (

reasonable

Add an article

a reasonable

show examples

amount) of disadvantages.

In addition

this

, a large number of flashy

advertisements

(animated web

add

Correct your spelling

ads

show examples

) can subconsciously have a detrimental effect on a child’s academics.

For instance

, after being barraged (bombard) by an endless amount of

advertisements

in a short span of time, juveniles (

youngster

Fix the agreement mistake

youngsters

show examples

) can lose their ability to focus on a certain task for an extended period of time.

Thus

being exposed to

such

advertisements

can take its toll (charge)on a child’s brain. After analyzing

this

, the demerits of

advertisements

targeting

children

are manifested (indicate/display). Following

this

look at how

advertisements

aimed at

children

can, undermine (weaken) their

behavior

Change the spelling

behaviour

show examples

, and hinder the achievement of their academic objectives, it is evident that these

advertisements

have adverse effects on

children

Thus

it is hoped that governments should muse (consider)

upon

Change preposition

apply

show examples

banning

such

advertisements

Submitted by ibrahimzafaracca on Sat Aug 13 2022

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

In conclusion
To conclude
To summarize
Finally
In a nutshell
In general

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7Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
6Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

330 words

4.50

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

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Some people believe that advertisements targeting children may have negative effects on them, and suggest banning such advertisements as a solution. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Include an introduction and conclusion

Nowadays many people complain that they have difficulties getting enough sleep. What problems can a lack of sleep cause? What can be done about lack of sleep?

Is it good for children to start using computers from an early age and spend long hours on them? Discuss the advantages and disadvantages.

The best way to help under-achieving pupils is to have compulsory after school activities which they must attend. This way they will become more involved in schools and their grades will improve. To what extent do you agree?

Computers and modems have made it possible for office workers to do much of their works from home instead of working in offices every day. Working from home should be encouraged as it is good for workers and employees. Do you agree or disagree?