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These days, mobile phones and the internet are very important to the ways in which people relate to one another socially. (Thesis) Do the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages?

#phones #internet #people #thesis #development
In
this
 day and age, there is no denying that cell phones and the internet have become the main source and approach for people to communicate with others. I believe that the merits outweigh its demerits and the reasons will be provided in the following paragraphs.
On the other hand
, others reckon that netizens who spend too much time on their cellphones and cyberspace may experience eye problems.
Nevertheless
, there
is
Change the verb form
are
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 already improvements on most of the phones where the blue rays can be
lessen
Wrong verb form
lessened
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 using a feature of the phone;
in addition
, users may wear
an
Remove the article
apply
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eye wear
Correct your spelling
eyewear
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 that protects their eyes from those rays. it can be solved
with
Change preposition
by
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 limiting the time for them to use
such
 technologies along with routine eye
check-up
Fix the agreement mistake
check-ups
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.
For example
, I … In conclusion, I suppose that portable phones and the internet provide more benefits than
its
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
disadvantages which can be rectified by limiting the time of using these devices.
Submitted by gac7077 on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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