Certain parents believe that good parenting means constantly being involved in the lives of their children. While some parents believe it is better for the development of their children if they learn to deal with situations by themselves. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

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Introduction
Today most
parents
Use synonyms
are
concern
Wrong verb form
concerned
show examples
about the best way of rearing their
offsprings
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offspring
show examples
. Some people are into
be
Wrong verb form
being
show examples
more involved with
children
Use synonyms
and some believe that
children
Use synonyms
should be allowed to learn more from their own
experience
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experiences
show examples
. In
this
Linking Words
essay
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,essay
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I will
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discuss
discusse
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discuss
both sides of
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argument
arguments
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the argumrnt
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argumrnt
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argument
and give
mines
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mine
show examples
at the end.
Body paragraph 1
On one hand,
Parents
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who believe
more
Change preposition
in more
show examples
involvement with the
nutrturing
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nurturing
the
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of the
show examples
children
Use synonyms
are more
concern
Replace the word
concerned
show examples
about the effects of
out
Change preposition
apply
show examples
of
family
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a family
show examples
environment
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environments
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like
nieghbourhood
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neighbourhood
or social media. They usually try to control most of the
child
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child's
show examples
activity to protect him/her from outside danger. But
this
Linking Words
if exert
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, if exert severele and more strict,
show examples
severele
Correct your spelling
severely
several
and more strict may lead to child
rebelness
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rebels
and make him
defeant
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defiant
defeat
with
parents
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, and later
on
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,on
show examples
affect his/her socialization and carrier issues.
Body paragraph 2
On the other hand
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, others think that giving more
opportunity
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opportunities
show examples
to
children
Use synonyms
would result in being more realistic.
For example
Linking Words
, if
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children
childern
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children
have not
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received
recieved
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received
intense
supervisions
Fix the agreement mistake
supervision
show examples
, they
and
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apply
show examples
learn by trial and error and
this
Linking Words
is more effective rather
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than
show examples
that
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than
show examples
giving them instruction only.
Linking Words
Furthermore
Add a comma
,Furthermore
show examples
this
Linking Words
kind of parenting
give
Change the verb form
gives
show examples
more
opprtunity
Correct your spelling
opportunity
to
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patients
patents
paternts
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parents
themselves to be less
worry
Wrong verb form
worried
show examples
and more free to live their lives too.
Conclusion
In summary, In my way of thinking,
Although
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, every child
need
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needs
show examples
to be supervised by her/his
parents
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and be guided
them
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apply
show examples
,
but
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apply
show examples
iyt
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it
is better that
for
Change preposition
apply
show examples
most of the time they do not experience parental pressure and get
courege
Correct your spelling
courage
to try experiences in a
real life
Add a hyphen
real-life
show examples
situation which likely would help them to be more efficient in individual and societal domain

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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