Doctors, Nurses, and teachers make a great contribution to society and should be payed more than entertainment and sport celebrities. Do you agree or disagree ?

#doctors #nurses #teachers #contribution #society #entertainment #sport #celebrities

Nowadays, artists and

athletes

are receiving more money than other pivotal

jobs

which have been well-contributed to society

such

as teachers,

doctors

and

nurses

Change preposition

apply

show examples

which they should be more appreciated for improving their salary. I totally agree with

this

statement for some reasons. In recent decades, entertainers and professional

athletes

have been paid

Change preposition

apply

show examples

a great nominal of money even though their

jobs

are not really having a massive impact on society. While people who work in crucial aspects

such

as health and education aspect are not paid appropriately

with

Change preposition

for

show examples

their job. There are 2 main reasons why

doctors

nurses

, and

lecturers

should obtain more salaries than other

jobs

. The

first

reason is they are the backbone of a nation,

in other words

, all of them are having great impact to nurture the youngsters for a better

future

, not only for the country's

future

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

but

also

for the youngster themselves.

On the other hand

doctors

nurses

, and

lecturers

are really needed by citizens to share their knowledge and health. These

jobs

lead citizens to the right path.

For instance

doctors

and

nurses

tend to look after folk when they are getting sick and it is really useful for us than artists and professional players.

In addition

lecturers

have a tendency to bring a country

for

Change preposition

show examples

a great

future

due to they will teach

future

nations in school or college. As evidence, Finlandia has given great fees to their

doctors

nurses

, and teachers and Finlandia's government thinks that it is an appropriate way for appreciating them. To sum up,

doctors

nurses

, and

lecturers

have a massive impact on society than entertainers and

athletes

, and those workers should earn more money than entertainers and

athletes

. I believe that if the government or the employees pay for those

jobs

appropriately,

this

world will be better in the

future

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8Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
6Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
5Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

306 words

6.50

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

contribution
essential
well-being
education
training
dedication
entertain
inspire
significant
exorbitant
attract
talented
professions
improve
overall
quality
healthcare
priority
development
citizens

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Doctors, Nurses, and teachers make a great contribution to society and should be payed more than entertainment and sport celebrities. Do you agree or disagree ?

Various career and academic choices taken by high school graduates in Lakeside country in 2010 and 2020.

Because of the global economy, many goods including what we use as daily basics produced by other countries have to be transported for a long distance. To what extent do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages.

Many governments think that economic progress is their most important goal. Some people, however, think that other types of progress are equally important for a country. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

The problem with society today is that it is essentially unbalanced, with some people being paid huge salaries to work very long hours, whilst others do not have a job and have too much time on their hands. There is no middle ground. Do you agree or disagree?

It is expected that there will be a higher proportion of older people than that of young people in many countries in the future. Do you think it is a positive or negative development?