One of the consequences of improved medical care is that people are living longer and life expectancy is increasing. Do you think the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages?

It is true that along with the improvement of medical care, life expectancy
also
increases. While
this
development could be beneficial, I believe that the disadvantages outweigh the benefits.
To begin
with, there are several reasons why
people
might believe that living longer is advantageous.
Firstly
, increasing life expectancy gives elderly
people
more time to enjoy their lives. It is common that
people
spend most of their lives before retirement going to school and working. Additional time gives them the opportunity to pursue their dreams and goals,
such
as travelling, which might
had
Change the verb form
have
show examples
been neglected when they were younger.
Secondly
, living longer gives old
people
the opportunity to care for their family members. Many young couples in Vietnam live under the same roof as their parents.
Therefore
, grandparents could help take care of young parents’ children while they are at work. Despite the above arguments, I still believe that the disadvantages of
this
development outweigh its benefits. Elderly
people
are likely to deal with chronic diseases
such
as diabetes.
As a result
, more nursing homes must be built to provide old
people
with proper healthcare.
This
places great pressure on the healthcare system to meet the increasing needs of seniors.
Moreover
, as the population keeps ageing, the governments must increase the price of taxes to meet the seniors’ requirements
of
Change preposition
for
show examples
pensions.
This
means the labour force might have to work more to serve retired
people
, who can no longer contribute to the country’s economy. In conclusion, while
this
development of the healthcare system could be beneficial, it seems to me that the drawbacks still outweigh the benefits.
Submitted by ngoclamthieunang on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • life expectancy
  • elderly population
  • health care systems
  • pension funds
  • extended family relationships
  • quality of life
  • aging population
  • economic growth
  • volunteer work
  • expertise
  • financial planning
  • retirement
  • age-related diseases
  • medical research
  • healthier lifestyles
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