IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 7

Some people think that secondary school students should study international news as one of their subjects. Other people say this is a waste of valuable school time. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

#people #school #students #study #news #subjects #waste #time
Nowadays, people have different views about whether international
news
 should be part of the
subjects
 in secondary school or not.
Although
 some believe that inserting the international
news
 has an adverse impact, others, myself included, reckon that it is indeed the bottom line for
children
’s education. On the one hand, embedding the
subject
 called international
news
 on the lists of officially endorsed
subjects
 impedes loaded and valuable
children
’s time.
This
 means that the newly created
subjects
 distract the
children
's existing time from the schema of the lessons.
For example
, I saw many students struggling with their existing class schedule and they are
subject
 to lose focus on any supplementary
subject
.
Consequently
, the new
subject
 can hinder the
children
’s performance and arrangements in terms of the syllabus.
Furthermore
,
children
’s concentration on diverse
subjects
 conducted by the secondary school can be diluted by inserting novel affairs so that it impels
children
 to exert most of their time on supplement lessons rather than core ones.
On the other hand
, the international
news
subject
 can boost their insights into the process which is occurred in abroad. More importantly, instructors teaching different
subjects
 promote the
children
’s awareness of contemporary issues, cultures, and socioeconomic concepts.
For instance
 , history proves to be performed in the class for having consciousness about our country.
As a result
, the new
subjects
 contribute to
children
 having better insights about everything.
Moreover
, novel
subjects
 contribute to squeezing deliberately
children
 to pinpoint the brilliant students. To conclude, it might be a little too much for students to have it as a new
subject
;
however
, I suggest that
this
 kind of
subject
 is in favour of
children
’s formulation as well as their future careers.
Submitted by unalhuseynli2 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
Topic Vocabulary:
  • Global awareness
  • Critical thinking
  • Global citizenship
  • Cultural diversity
  • Communication skills
  • Historical context
  • World affairs
  • Academic subjects
  • Bias
  • Misinformation
  • Age-appropriate
  • Media literacy
  • Educational enrichment
What to do next:
Look at other essays: