For a long time art has been considered an essential part of all cultures in the world. However, nowadays people’s values have changed, and we tend to consider science, technology and business more important than arts. What do you think are the causes of this? What can be done to draw people’s attention to art?

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For thousands of years,

art

Use synonyms

has been taken into consideration as an integral part of society.

However

Linking Words

, in recent years, some more practical subjects

such

Linking Words

as technology, science, and business have drawn

people

Use synonyms

's attention.

This

Linking Words

problem happens

due to

Linking Words

certain reasons and the solutions will be discussed in

this

Linking Words

essay. There are several reasons why lucrative subjects are more important and appealing to

people

Use synonyms

Firstly

Linking Words

, there are more relevant occupational opportunities for these majors. In fact, a student who majors in business management will have more chance to find a decent job than an

art

Use synonyms

student.

For instance

Linking Words

, in developing countries, burgeoning markets are related to technology and business, since these communities are attempting to keep pace with other developed countries.

Moreover

Linking Words

, nowadays

people

Use synonyms

's lifestyle has so dramatically changed that a person is overwhelmed by work and social responsibilities.

People

Use synonyms

tend to have less free time and a short attention span.

Hence

Linking Words

, they tend to spend time on more recreational materials offered by technology

such

Linking Words

as movies, reality game shows or online videos. There are various feasible solutions to these aforementioned problems. First and foremost, funding could be granted to the

art

Use synonyms

subject.

Consequently

Linking Words

people

Use synonyms

are highly likely to be encouraged to study

this

Linking Words

major at university.

In addition

Linking Words

, if artists are financially supported they will be more offered to focus on works of

art

Use synonyms

rather than breadwinning.

Secondly

Linking Words

, free admission to

art

Use synonyms

galleries or museums may entice

people

Use synonyms

,from all walks of life, to visit these places.

In other words

Linking Words

, since human beings are neuralgically hardwired for arts

this

Linking Words

may provide them with the opportunity to visit these places and the next generation could be familiarised with cultural heritage.

To conclude

Linking Words

, there are numerous reasons why

people

Use synonyms

have lost their enthusiasm for

art

Use synonyms

,and some measures could be taken to solve

this

Linking Words

problem.

mitraghasemi6Wed Aug 24 2022

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task response

Improve the depth of your ideas and provide more specific examples to support your points.

coherence and cohesion

The logical structure is generally clear, but ensure that your ideas are linked together more cohesively within paragraphs and between them.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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13
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

304 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

STEM fields (Science, Technology, Engineering, and Mathematics)
evolve
technological advancements
overshadowing
financial pressures
practical careers
digital entertainment
accessible
integrated
curricula
fostering
emotional intelligence
public art projects
engage
interactive

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The most important aim of science should be to improve people's lives. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

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