The percentage of overweight children in Western society has increased by almost 20% in the last ten years. Discuss causes and effects of this disturbing trends. Give your solution for the causes.

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Issues related to obesity are frequently discussed these days. It is true that the number of obese kids has risen by 20% during these ten years. In

this

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essay, both the causes and effects of these situations will be critically examined and give

further

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examples and explanations to address

this

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problem. The main cause of

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issue is the world has changed a lot from the past, especially in eating habits.

Besides

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tasting preference, urban activities lifestyles mostly in entrepreneurs or seniors lead to the limited choice of restaurants

As a result

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, there are several fast food restaurant chains appearing on every single corner of the streets.

For example

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, in Ari's neighbourhood, you can count there are tons of KFC,

Mcdonald's

Correct your spelling

McDonald's

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, Pizza Company, and so on

instead

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of salad stores. All the things mentioned above are the appropriate reasons why we have increasingly found many cases of chubbiness in children. The primary effects of

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have been and will continue very serious.

Firstly

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, physical health has been dropped since they are overweight. Kids must inject Insulin into their body for the rest of their life.

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, getting bad words or bullying from friends can lead to numerous mental illnesses

such

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as depression, and loss of confidence in themselves.

To conclude

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, it appears that there is a variety of causes of these issues for young people and a variety of negative effects. Every parent must be focused on their descendants and keep preventing them from these situations before it is too late to

fix

Correct pronoun usage

fix them

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nyentdnMon Jul 15 2024

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task achievement

Your essay addresses the topic well, discussing both causes and effects as per the task requirements. However, try to expand more on the solutions, as this is part of what the prompt asks for.

task achievement

Ensure that your main points are clearly linked to specific examples. For instance, you mention fast food restaurants as a cause; discussing how their marketing towards children affects obesity could strengthen your argument.

coherence cohesion

Work on varying the sentence structure to maintain the reader’s interest and improving the academic tone.

coherence cohesion

Consider refining your essay’s structure. While your essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, the body paragraphs could benefit from more clearly delineated topic sentences.

coherence cohesion

The introduction sets the stage well by stating the issue and what the essay will cover.

task achievement

You have successfully linked causes to effects, particularly how eating habits and fast food culture contribute to obesity.

Answer the 'Problem and Solution' topic

Problem-and-solution essays fall naturally into two parts, the first describing and exploring the problem, the second setting out the solution or solutions.

You essay structure should look something like this:

Introduction
Body paragraph 1 – Problems
Body paragraph 2 – Solutions
Conclusion

Examples to start your body paragraph:

One of the first problems of the...
Another problem that needs to be considered...
A possible solution to this problem would be...
One immediate practical solution is to...

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10
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meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 7.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

253 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

consumption
processed snacks
sedentary lifestyle
digital entertainment
balanced diet
junk food
diabetes
high blood pressure
heart diseases
low self-esteem
nutritious meal options
combat
educational programs
obesity

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The percentage of overweight children in Western society has increased by almost 20% in the last ten years. Discuss causes and effects of this disturbing trends. Give your solution for the causes.

Answer the 'Problem and Solution' topic

Increasing the price of petrol is the best way to solve growing traffic and pollution problems. To what extent do you agree or disagree? What other measures do you think might be effective.

In their advertising, businesses nowadays usually emphasise that their products are new in some way. Why is this? Do you think it is a positive or negative development?

Some people think that art is an essential subject for children at school while others think it is a waste of time.Do you think the advantages of art subject outweigh the disadvantages?

Online shopping has become a done by people. It has positive and negative effects on individuals, society and business. It has more advantages than disadvantages