IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

In the past, knowledge was contained in books. Nowadays, knowledge is uploaded to the internet. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages?

#books #internet #outweigh
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In
this
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 modern era of technology, all pieces of
information
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 can be found online which is a way different compared to the past when
people
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 could only take help from physical books to acquire knowledge. Having said that,
according to
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 my view, the
internet
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 has brought more benefits in comparison to its drawbacks.
To begin
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 with , nowadays the
internet
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is providing
Wrong verb form
provides
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 the flexibility of gathering any material regardless of the subject or topic
whereas
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 ,in the past, a person could not learn anything without buying the relevant source of physical books which was quite a challenge since books price was high
then
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. In recent days, the public only needs to have an
internet
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 connection to have access to all kinds of
information
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;
thus
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, everyone is able to learn and become informed.
Secondly
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, those who are mainly students, do not need to commute to libraries anymore since they can find all materials needed from their homes.
On the other hand
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, some
people
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 believe that online
information
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 can be manipulated. Despite the facility to reach any kind of subject, the
internet
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 can
also
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 provide misinformation
due to
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 the fact that anyone can put articles, works or sources online. To explicate
further
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, Wikipedia, which is one of the most accessed
portal
Change to a plural noun
portals
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 on the
internet
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, help learners from all parts of the world,
however
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, most parts of the data displayed there are wrong and lead
people
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 to extract wrong
information
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 from the articles.
This
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 happens
due to
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 the fact that anyone can upload and edit the
information
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 directly on the website.
As a result
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,
people
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 could easily input wrong
information
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 in order to harm learners.
To conclude
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, it is evident that online sources have carried some misinformations to some extent but
this
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 downside cannot overtake the number of facilities and easy accessibilities it provides to get knowledge these days.
Submitted by mdshaifulakbar on

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task response
Provide more specific and varied examples to support your points. Additionally, ensure that your essay directly addresses all parts of the given question.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay demonstrates a logical structure and presents clear main points with appropriate supporting details. However, consider using more cohesive devices such as linking words and transition phrases to improve the flow of your ideas.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • Digital literacy
  • E-learning
  • Virtual libraries
  • Cyberspace
  • Search engine literacy
  • Critical evaluation skills
  • Open-source information
  • Data mining
  • Intellectual property
  • Digital preservation
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