Nowadays parents give more freedom to their children than in the past. is it a positive or negative development. Give your opinion and include relevant examples.

At present,
parents
are more friendly with their children as compared to ancient.
Although
, if they get more freedom the possibility to come under bad companies will increase,
however
, it
also
helps them to enhance their hidden talent. In the forthcoming, paragraphs we will discuss all the views of the essay.
To begin
with, there are a plethora of drawbacks if the mother and father do not have control over their heir.
Firstly
, nowadays,
due to
technology students are influenced by electronic equipment
hence
, if
parents
give more freedom to them they will waste their quality time on mobile
instead
of completing their homework.
For example
, a survey revealed that
parents
to avoid destruction during their work allow juveniles to watch videos
as well as
play online games on their phones.
Secondly
,
due to
a lack of concentration by elder members of the family
toddler
Fix the agreement mistake
toddlers
show examples
come under terrible people companies,
as
Correct word choice
and as
show examples
a result, they become criminals which
cause
Verb problem
has
show examples
a detrimental effect on their
life
Fix the agreement mistake
lives
show examples
.
On the other hand
, if
parents
behave politely with infants
then
they can share their
feeling
Fix the agreement mistake
feelings
show examples
with them and sometimes it will help them in their future growth.
For instance
,
due to
the friendly atmosphere of the house children do not feel hesitant to discuss their future goals.
Moreover
, being given freedom by
parents
not only allowed children to
take
Correct your spelling
make
show examples
decisions independently in their
life
Fix the agreement mistake
lives
show examples
but
also
they can show their hidden talent by
taking
Verb problem
apply
show examples
participating in their
interested
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
fields.
To conclude
, in the present era the friendly behaviour of
guardian
Fix the agreement mistake
guardians
show examples
helps their heir to develop several kinds of skills in a different field but sometimes it becomes more challenging for them in light of the fact that they can forget the culture and tradition of our history without
parents
' control of them.
Submitted by gurmit.150 on

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Task Achievement
The essay addresses the prompt by discussing both positive and negative aspects of parents giving more freedom to children. However, there is room for improvement in providing a more balanced argument with clearer examples.
Coherence and Cohesion
The essay has a logical structure with introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion. The ideas are connected, but some sentences could be better linked for smoother transitions.

Your opinion

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...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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