Nowadays parents give more freedom to their children than in the past. is it a positive or negative development. Give your opinion and include relevant examples.
At present,
parents
are more friendly with their children as compared to ancient. Although
, if they get more freedom the possibility to come under bad companies will increase, however
, it also
helps them to enhance their hidden talent. In the forthcoming, paragraphs we will discuss all the views of the essay.
To begin
with, there are a plethora of drawbacks if the mother and father do not have control over their heir. Firstly
, nowadays, due to
technology students are influenced by electronic equipment hence
, if parents
give more freedom to them they will waste their quality time on mobile instead
of completing their homework. For example
, a survey revealed that parents
to avoid destruction during their work allow juveniles to watch videos as well as
play online games on their phones. Secondly
, due to
a lack of concentration by elder members of the family toddler
come under terrible people companies, Fix the agreement mistake
toddlers
as
a result, they become criminals which Correct word choice
and as
cause
a detrimental effect on their Verb problem
has
life
.
Fix the agreement mistake
lives
On the other hand
, if parents
behave politely with infants then
they can share their feeling
with them and sometimes it will help them in their future growth. Fix the agreement mistake
feelings
For instance
, due to
the friendly atmosphere of the house children do not feel hesitant to discuss their future goals. Moreover
, being given freedom by parents
not only allowed children to take
decisions independently in their Correct your spelling
make
life
but Fix the agreement mistake
lives
also
they can show their hidden talent by taking
participating in their Verb problem
apply
interested
fields.
Correct word choice
apply
To conclude
, in the present era the friendly behaviour of guardian
helps their heir to develop several kinds of skills in a different field but sometimes it becomes more challenging for them in light of the fact that they can forget the culture and tradition of our history without Fix the agreement mistake
guardians
parents
' control of them.Submitted by gurmit.150 on
Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
Task Achievement
The essay addresses the prompt by discussing both positive and negative aspects of parents giving more freedom to children. However, there is room for improvement in providing a more balanced argument with clearer examples.
Coherence and Cohesion
The essay has a logical structure with introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion. The ideas are connected, but some sentences could be better linked for smoother transitions.
Your opinion
Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.
If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.
Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.
Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:
...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?
Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+
Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!