In some countries children are engaged in some kind of paid work. Some people regard this as completely wrong, whereas/ while others consider it as valuable work experience, important for learning and taking responsibility.

Nowadays, more and more students are having
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
Add a hyphen
part-time
show examples
part
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part-time
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time
jobs, some of them
are aim
Change the verb form
are aimed
are aiming
show examples
to earn more pocket money for themselves,
others
Correct word choice
and others
show examples
work
to subsidize their families. But is it really necessary for
Add an article
the student
a student
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student
Fix the agreement mistake
students
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to find a
job
rather than study more? On the one hand, some people might think it is a good way for children who have a
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part-time
show examples
part
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part-time
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time
job
to learn something beyond
the
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apply
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school
.
For example
, they not only can learn how to socialize with other employees but
also
realizing
Wrong verb form
realise
show examples
how different the
work
is from
school
and
workplace
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the workplace
show examples
.
Furthermore
, having a
Add a hyphen
part-time
show examples
part
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part-time
show examples
time
job
during
the
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apply
show examples
school
time
can help you understand the
hard
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hardships
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of making money
,
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apply
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so that you would become more mature and would not splurge on something you want rather than actually need it.
On the other hand
, others insist that children should spend their whole
time
on
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apply
show examples
learning
,
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apply
show examples
because they think it is the only way to increase their children’s competitiveness in the future. If you don’t keep
the
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your
show examples
grades well in
the
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apply
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school
, it is impossible for you to get
the
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apply
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tickets to enter
the
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apply
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famous enterprises
such
as Google and Apple.
Additionally
, the opportunity costs are too big to
having
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have
show examples
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
work
during
school
time
. As a student who doesn’t have any degree yet, the only payment you can get is the basic one, so why don’t you study hard right now and search
a
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for a
show examples
high paid
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high-paid
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job
in the future? As far as I am concerned, I think it depends on what kind of
job
you
work
in, if you
work
in a company
that is
related to your major during
school
time
, it will be seen as a great experience when you are searching for jobs.
However
, if you
work
in a place that
don’t
Change the verb form
doesn’t
show examples
have any expertise, I think it is really a waste of
time
.
Submitted by wanyt88 on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • Child labor
  • Exploitation
  • Minimum age
  • Work experience
  • Survival
  • Taking responsibility
  • Education
  • Poverty
  • Legal restrictions
  • Physical toll
  • Psychological impact
  • Cultural perceptions
  • International conventions
  • Economic impact
  • Work-study programs
  • Skilled labor
  • Unskilled labor
  • Developing economies
  • Moral implications
  • Professional development
What to do next:
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