IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

The only way to ensure road safety is to give much stricter punishments on driving offences. To what extent do you agree?

#road #safety #punishments #offences
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
One of the
way
Change to a plural noun
ways
show examples
 to ensure
road
Use synonyms
safety
Use synonyms
 is
giving
Change the verb form
to give
show examples
 stricter
punishments
Use synonyms
on
Change preposition
for
show examples
 driving offences. I completely agree
to
Change preposition
with
show examples
this
Linking Words
 statement. To avoid breaking the law
drivers
Use synonyms
 should follow the special
rules
Use synonyms
.
Stricking
Correct your spelling
Striking
Sticking
punishments
Use synonyms
 will correct
this
Linking Words
 situation. To keep
road
Use synonyms
safety
Use synonyms
,
first
Linking Words
people
Use synonyms
 have to follow the
rules
Use synonyms
 to avoid taking stricter
punishments
Use synonyms
. Stricter
punishments
Use synonyms
 will change the situation if the person
do
Change the verb form
does
show examples
 not ensure
road
Use synonyms
safety
Use synonyms
its
Replace the word
it's
it is
show examples
 bad for himself and for others. When
person
Add an article
a person
show examples
 drives very fast he can have a
car
Use synonyms
 accident or at least he will take stricter punishment. In most
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
situations
drivers
Use synonyms
in
Add a missing verb
are in
show examples
 a hurry and
its
Correct your spelling
it's
show examples
 the reason why they take stricter
punishments
Use synonyms
. For keeping peoples status
in
Change preposition
at
show examples
 the same level government create special
rules
Use synonyms
 like: do not drive a
car
Use synonyms
 with more than 90
killometress
Correct your spelling
kilometres
,
do
Correct word choice
and do
show examples
 not parking
Use synonyms
car
Correct article usage
a car
show examples
 where you must not
parking
Change the form of the verb
park
show examples
 your
car
Use synonyms
. The
people
Use synonyms
also
Linking Words
 should follow the
rules
Use synonyms
. If the
drivers
Use synonyms
 ensure
road
Use synonyms
safety
Use synonyms
 but
people
Use synonyms
 who are not driving a
car
Use synonyms
 do not ensure
road
Use synonyms
safety
Use synonyms
 it is not true from their position. The
people
Use synonyms
 and the
drivers
Use synonyms
 should follow the
rules
Use synonyms
 and
than
Replace the word
then
show examples
 they can ensure
road
Use synonyms
safety
Use synonyms
.
For
Linking Words
example
Add a comma
,example
show examples
 the
stastics
Correct your spelling
statistics
 show that in countries where
drivers
Use synonyms
 and
people
Use synonyms
 take stricter
punishments
Use synonyms
 in
this
Linking Words
 country bad situation like
car
Use synonyms
 accidents is less than
other
Change preposition
in other
show examples
 countries. In conclusion. I can say that if the person
ensure
Change the verb form
ensures
show examples
road
Use synonyms
safety
Use synonyms
 it will
safe
Replace the word
save
show examples
someones
Change noun form
someone's
show examples
 life or their life. I absolutely agree with
this
Linking Words
 statement
people
Use synonyms
 must ensure
road
Use synonyms
safety
Use synonyms
 no
mater they
Correct your spelling
matter the
show examples
 driver or just
people
Use synonyms
 without
Use synonyms
car
Add an article
a car
show examples
. We must know that the
rules
Use synonyms
is
Change the verb form
are
show examples
 to
keeping
Change the form of the verb
keep
show examples
 us in
safety
Use synonyms
. Stricter punishment is the best way to ensure
road
Use synonyms
safety
Use synonyms
.
Submitted by javokhir_85 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • deter
  • reckless behavior
  • psychological deterrence
  • adhere
  • penalties
  • awareness campaigns
  • knowledge and skills
  • technological solutions
  • advanced safety features
  • automatic braking systems
  • lane departure warnings
  • traffic surveillance
  • enforce laws
  • socio-economic impact
  • disproportionately
  • broader social issues
  • community engagement
  • road safety culture
  • collective responsibility
What to do next:
Look at other essays: