IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7.5

It is now possible for scientist in tourists to travel to remote natural environments such as the south pole. Do the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages?

#scientist #tourists #travel #environments #pole #development
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
With the rise of technology, people are able to explore and observe
this
Linking Words
 world and the universe to a greater extent. Nowadays, scientists and tourists are able to visit remote natural environments
such
Linking Words
 as the south pole. Here, I will discuss two benefits and one drawback of
this
Linking Words
 development and analyse whether the advantages outweigh the disadvantages. A major advantage of being able to visit harsh ecosystems is that scientists are able to learn more about them.
As a result
Linking Words
 of increased knowledge, they are able to generate new scientific theories that increase humanity's understanding of the world.
For example
Linking Words
, the discovery of giant creatures in the deep sea led to the theory that larger animals have a lower metabolism rate.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, explorers may discover new fauna and flora which may inspire inventions.
For instance
Linking Words
, by studying birds, people were inspired to make planes. The more we learn, the more we invent and understand. Another benefit is that tourists are able to gain a broader range of experiences by visiting
such
Linking Words
 environments. Humans are naturally curious beings so we feel excited and satisfied when we make unforgettable memories
such
Linking Words
 as meeting a giant squid.
Hence
Linking Words
,
this
Linking Words
 may lead to a happier society. The only issue I see is that humans may disturb the nature of these remote areas. When biologists and environmentalists set up camps and their equipment, the surroundings get changed inevitably. If there is any wildlife, they would get disturbed which may cause them to attack or hide.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, when many visitors come to their environment, these animals may lose their habitat.
However
Linking Words
, if we explore these environments with caution, we can avoid
this
Linking Words
 problem. To summarise, while the only drawback of visiting remote surroundings can be mitigated, the opportunities offered remain invaluable.
Therefore
Linking Words
, I believe that the advantages of
this
Linking Words
 development outweigh its disadvantages.
Submitted by ineshp2020 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: