IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 2

Traditional medicines, such as herbal remedies and acupuncture, are very popular in some countries. Those who practice traditional medicines claim that it is better than modern medicine in maintaining and improving health. Do you agree or disagree with this viewpoint?

#medicines #remedies #acupuncture #countries #practice #medicine #health
The pie chart
illustrate
Change the verb form
illustrates
show examples
 the proportion of six different energies produced from resources in a country in 1985 and 2003. Overall, it is clear from the charts that
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
oil
mostly
Add a missing verb
is mostly
show examples
 produced from resources in a country, while other renewable produced the least in both years. According to the pie chart in 1985, the highest proportion of the energies production was occupied by oil at 52%.
This
 is followed by nuclear at 22 % and natural gas at 13 %. In comparison, coal energy was produced at 8 % and hydro at 4% and the least energy produced is
other
Change the wording
another
show examples
 renewable at 1%.
In addition
, in 2003, the production of oil and nuclear dramatically decreased
at
Change preposition
by
show examples
 39 % and 8 %, respectively. On the
contary
Correct your spelling
contrary
 production of coal and natural gas
Correct your spelling
significantly
significanly
Correct your spelling
significantly
 increased at 22 % and 23 % in 2003.
Additionally
, the proportion of
other renewable
Change the wording
another renewable
other renewables
show examples
 slightly increased to 4 and Hydro energy
stable
Add a missing verb
was stable
show examples
 at 4 %.
Submitted by narongdejteeranurak on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
What to do next:
Look at other essays: