In recent years, life has become more stress full than it has even been. nAs a consequence more and more people are suffering from stress realated problems. what factors are contributing to this increase and what do you think can be done to overcome the current problems.

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
In recent times,
people
Use synonyms
are becoming very stressed about their lives, and everyone is going through something. It causes numerous mental health issues for
people
Use synonyms
. There are
few
Correct article usage
a few
show examples
main factors that
causing
Change the form of the verb
cause
show examples
people
Use synonyms
getting
Change the verb form
to get
show examples
stress
Wrong verb form
stressed
show examples
about their
Use synonyms
life
Fix the agreement mistake
lives
show examples
.
Firstly
Linking Words
,
people
Use synonyms
have long average working hours, and only a few
people
Use synonyms
are working in their desired
field
Fix the agreement mistake
fields
show examples
.
however
Linking Words
,
majority
Correct article usage
the majority
show examples
of the
people
Use synonyms
are doing unlikeable jobs that they are not interested
.
Change preposition
in.
show examples
It leads them to feel more stressed about their
life
Use synonyms
.
For instance
Linking Words
, when
people
Use synonyms
get married,
then
Linking Words
they have more responsibilities than before. They cannot leave their job even if they do not want to do it because of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
financial commitments.
Secondly
Linking Words
,
people
Use synonyms
are not living in the present moment. They are overthinking about their future.
Besides
Linking Words
, some
people
Use synonyms
also
Linking Words
have personal problems like relationship break-ups, divorce, and failures. There are many ways to tackle
Linking Words
this situations
Change the determiner
this situation
these situations
show examples
in
life
Use synonyms
. First of all,
people
Use synonyms
should understand that
up
Replace the word
ups
show examples
and downs
is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
show examples
part and parcel of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
life
Use synonyms
. they have to have a strong positive mindset about it.
Secondly
Linking Words
,
people
Use synonyms
should enjoy the present moment rather than thinking about something which is going to happen in the future and they cannot predict
also
Linking Words
what is going to happen in the future. So there is no point in worrying.
Thirdly
Linking Words
,
people
Use synonyms
can
take
Verb problem
get
show examples
regular counselling from
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
doctors if they feel stress in
life
Use synonyms
which may help them to think in a better way.
To conclude
Linking Words
this
Linking Words
topic, I would suggest that
people
Use synonyms
to
Fix the infinitive
apply
show examples
live
happy
Change the word
happily
show examples
in their
life
Use synonyms
without getting
stress
Wrong verb form
stressed
show examples
about something which is not going to happen.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

grammar
Make sure to check for grammatical errors and punctuation to improve the overall clarity of your writing.
coherence
Use more cohesive devices (like linking words) to help the logical flow of your ideas.
task response
Expand on your supporting points with more details or examples to strengthen your argument.
content
Your ability to identify the main factors contributing to stress is commendable.
content
You successfully suggested practical solutions to address stress-related issues.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: