Many young people today spend too much time following the latest fashion trends in areas such as clothing and technology. To what extend do you agree or disagree.

#people #time #fashion #trends #areas #technology

this

day and age, Youngsters spend lavishly to stay updated on their looks and technical knowledge.

However

, upgrading oneself with the ongoing fashion and gizmos must not be at the stake of hard-earned money. I strongly condemn

this

unnecessary expenditure on the expensive things which burn the pockets.

To begin

with, it is nowadays quite mundane the

spending

Replace the word

spend

show examples

on unwanted things and misuse

salaries

Change preposition

of salaries

show examples

Moreover

, children are more interestingly focused on the recent trends and electronic equipment so that they can brag with their peers.

For instance

, it has been observed that 80 per cent of youngsters buy exorbitant phones just to boast and flaunt their peer circle.

This

may result in forcing the parents to buy these devices or they may engage themselves in procuring money from illegal activities.

Furthermore

, dwelling with the latest gadgets will detrimentally affect the studies of children as they will focus more on using advanced technology.

In addition

, these modern technical things would ruin the traditional way of learning in schools and colleges. In a recent survey by

technical trend

Correct your spelling

Technical Trend

show examples

magazine, it was seen that the young generation is inclining more towards the latest watches, phones and cars as compared to ten years back which is profoundly impacting their academic outcomes.

Therefore

, bringing these unwanted needs would dilapidate their career prospects as they tend to spend a hefty amount of time on

such

type of equipment. In conclusion,

although

staying upgraded to fashion and technology is required in

this

globalised world,

this

must not be gained with

extravagantly

Change the adverb

extravagant

show examples

spending.

Submitted by tarankaur15 on Fri Sep 02 2022

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task response

The response is relevant and mostly addresses the prompt. However, there is some lack of clarity and development in some areas.

coherence and cohesion

The introduction and conclusion are present, but they lack depth and clarity. The essay would benefit from stronger structural coherence and clearer connection between ideas.

Do you want to check your IELTS essays?

Submit unlimited essays, letters and charts. Sign up right now and start improving your writing skills.

10Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

254 words

5.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 checks
Get all the feedback you need to keep improving your charts and letters.
Unlimited Task 2 checks
Practice and perfect your skills with essays.
Personalized suggestions
Know how to boost your score.
Detailed mistakes analysis
Get instant feedback. Spot every mistake.
Topic ideas generator
Get topic-specific ideas to enhance your writing.
Vocabulary helper
Get the right words for any topic.
Progress tracking
Track your writing improvements.

Topic Vocabulary:

Fashion-forward
Trendsetting
Peer pressure
Consumerism
Brand-conscious
Social media influencers
Sustainable fashion
Eco-consciousness
Disposable income
Fast fashion
Technophile
Digital divide
Planned obsolescence
Status symbol
Cutting-edge
Materialistic
Ethical consumerism
Personal identity
Body image

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

6
band
some say that the most important thing about being rich is that one has the opportunityto help others. to what extend do yopu agree or disagree
Some people believe that one of the prominent benefits of being affluent is that they can think of others. I, personally agree with the said notion that rich people can play a crucial role in uplifting the condition of poor people because of mainly two reasons; firstly, they are capable of doing various charitable works. Secondly, they can create employment opportunities for people.
5
band
Many governments think that economic progress is their most important goal. Some people, however, think that other types of progress are equally important for a country. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
It is certainly true that economic growth is necessary. The main reason is that it can lead to increased job opportunities, high wages, and improved standards of living for citizens. One good illustration of this is America - one of the strongest countries in the world, which is extremely popular with modern society and well-paid workers. Another reason is that it is also beneficial for governments to have greater tax revenues. For example, the average tax rate of a normal worker in the USA face to is about 24,8% in 2022, this is not a humble amount compared to other countries.
6
band
Some people regard video games as harmless fun, or even as a useful educational tool. Others, however, believe that videos games are having an adverse effect on the people who play them. Discuss both views and give your opinion.
While some people think that playing video games is an inoffensive way to have fun or even a convenient tool for education, others truly believe that these games have a negative impact on their users. In my opinion, these computer games are unfavourable for those who use them.
5.5
band
Some people think that the family is the most important influence on young adults. Other people think that friends are the most important influence on young adults. Which view do you agree with?
There is no doubt that teenage is where a child learns habits for life. While some argue that family plays an important role in influencing children, I believe friends have the most impact on an individual's life.
4.5
band
Some people believe that allowing children to make their own choices on everything matters is likely to result in a society of individual who only think about their own wishes. Other people believe that it is important for children to make decisions about matters that affect them. Discuss both the views and give your opinion.
Computers are becoming an essential part of education. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages and give your own opinion.

Many young people today spend too much time following the latest fashion trends in areas such as clothing and technology. To what extend do you agree or disagree.

some say that the most important thing about being rich is that one has the opportunityto help others. to what extend do yopu agree or disagree

Many governments think that economic progress is their most important goal. Some people, however, think that other types of progress are equally important for a country. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Some people regard video games as harmless fun, or even as a useful educational tool. Others, however, believe that videos games are having an adverse effect on the people who play them. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Some people think that the family is the most important influence on young adults. Other people think that friends are the most important influence on young adults. Which view do you agree with?