A family has a great influence on children's development, but the outside of home plays a bigger part in children's life. Do you agree or disagree?

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It is universally accepted that

children

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’s early education plays a most essential role in their growth. Under

such

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consensus, there are individuals who assume that it is the outer environment, superior to the

home

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, that has a greater influence on their growth.

For

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Correct pronoun usage

apply

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, I partly agree with

this

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statement. I believe both factors

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apply

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domestic and outside have their strong effect and it is over-generalized to say which one outweighs the other.

To begin

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with, it is reasonable to say the factors outside the

home

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have definite significance when it comes to

children

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’s development,

such

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as the schools, and public places. To be specific, most parents send their son or daughter to school for formal education, which is more organized and effective. During

this

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process,

children

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will absorb what their teachers impart, including knowledge and moral principles, or they will communicate with other classmates about homework or daily

life

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, etc.

Therefore

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, their personality and quality will form simultaneously, setting a concrete basis

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for

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their growth.

In addition

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, other situations like strangers’ behaviour in the tube or in shopping malls, may have distinctive influences on youngsters.

However

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, we should not place domestic factors as an inferior aspect of

children

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’s growing up. The

home

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is where a child is born and raised, which is most vital since

children

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spend much amount of time at

home

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and parents are their

first

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teachers, showing kids manners and approaches in dealing with different issues in their

life

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, which will exert effects directly on their offspring. Parents must be there and behave themselves,

otherwise

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younger generation will see and hear,

then

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become negative, and even commit a crime, making

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apply

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chaos in society, which is obviously detrimental. On top of

this

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, a family’s atmosphere is very much contributing to their personality forming. If it is harmonious,

children

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are evident to be taken good care of,

thus

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they can be more confident and optimistic, marching onto their future with a positive outlook and leading a happy

life

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. Or else, there will always be an emotional deficit, and

life

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would be hard for them until they cure themselves with a

life

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-long period. Given all the points above, I consider that we value both aspects at

home

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and outside, to make

children

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have complete character. The whole society should focus on education more in case of neglecting their development.

654283345Fri Sep 02 2022

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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10
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
5
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

391 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

socialization
nurturing
foundational behavior
emotional development
peer influence
media exposure
intellectual development
cultural norms
societal pressures
family environment
academic expectations

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A family has a great influence on children's development, but the outside of home plays a bigger part in children's life. Do you agree or disagree?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Many children these days have an unhealthy lifestyle. Both schools and parents are responsible for solving this problem. To what extent do you agree with this statement

Modern technology is being used more and more in different aspects of our lives, such as education. Do the advantages of using technology as an educational tool outweigh its disadvantages? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

In some countries, it is illegal for companies to reject job applicants for their age. Is this a positive or negative development?

some people think that in a city,the best way to travel is by car ,while other people think that bicycle a re a better way of travelling in the city give reasons to answers

All parents want the best opportunities for their children. There are some people who think that schools should teach children skills but others think having a range of subjects is better for a children’s future. Discuss both views and give your opinion.