The number of overweight children in developed countries is increasing. Some people think that it is due to problems such as the growing number of fast food outlets. Others believed that parents are to blame for not looking after their children’s health. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#children #countries #people #food #outlets #parents #children’s #health

There is no doubt that these days obesity diseases are becoming increasingly in the nations ,especially among

children

. Some people consider that raising a number of overweight

children

is based on

parents

' inattention , while others argue against that contention. I completely agree with

this

opinion and think that

parents

who are not carrying for their

children

are the main blame for

such

phenomenon. in the succeeding paragraphs, I intend to delve into the rationale for both beliefs as well as proffer justification for my viewpoint.

First

of all, I believe that

parents

are the main ones responsible for not monitoring their

children

’s health is reasonable. the main reason given to support

this

claim is that

parents

work a long time and they are seeking to fast solutions to feed their

children

For instance

, when

parents

have shift night they buy fast

food

for them rather than making a natural cooked meal,

Thus

, the

children

will suffer from a lot of diseases and lose vitamins from their body.

Moreover

children

this

sensitive age need much monitoring in their choices of

food

in other words

, the

children

do not much care about the value of the

food

and do not have the knowledge about which kind of

food

should eat. To illustrate, if make the

children

choose between an egg or a small piece of cake to eat for breakfast they will decide to eat the latest option. In conclusion, it is evident that

parents

are to blame for not looking after their

children

’s health.

parents

must ensure steps are taken to prevent

this

phenomenon from deteriorating future.

Submitted by eaalyahyan on Fri Sep 02 2022

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Do you want to check your IELTS essays?

Submit unlimited essays, letters and charts. Sign up right now and start improving your writing skills.

7Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

268 words

8.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 9.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 checks
Get all the feedback you need to keep improving your charts and letters.
Unlimited Task 2 checks
Practice and perfect your skills with essays.
Personalized suggestions
Know how to boost your score.
Detailed mistakes analysis
Get instant feedback. Spot every mistake.
Topic ideas generator
Get topic-specific ideas to enhance your writing.
Vocabulary helper
Get the right words for any topic.
Progress tracking
Track your writing improvements.

Topic Vocabulary:

overweight
developed countries
fast food outlets
sedentary lifestyle
calories
fat
sugar
weight gain
convenience
affordability
nutrition
healthy eating habits
socioeconomic status
access to
government policies
regulations
advertising restrictions
holistic approach
intervention

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

6
band
Some people say that schools should concentrate on teaching students academic subjects that will be useful for their future careers. Other say that subjects such as music and sports are also necessary. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.
In today’s fast-paced society, various high-income job vacancies require more professional skills so parents have become more and more conscious of the importance of studying at school. While many people have an opinion of emphasizing only academic subjects, others oppose this idea because of the necessity of other subjects. From my perspective, it is essential for students to strike a balance at school.
5.5
band
Some people say that older, more traditional buildings in cities should be preserved. Others believe that these buildings should be demolished and new ones built in their place. Discuss both these views and give your opinion.
People often debate whether an ancient buildings should be built up or destroyed. Some of them consider that they will be landmarks whereas others believe that they are useless.
7.5
band
In many countries, there is shortage of housing due to growing population. Some people argue that new towns should be built in the country side, others argue for the regeneration of cities. What are the advantages and disadvantages of building new towns in the country?
There is a scarcity of housing due to the growing population in different parts of the world. While many believe that major cities should be rebuilt because of the disadvantages of building new towns, It is valid that new cities should be constructed in the rural areas for several advantages.
5
band
In many countries, some students live with their families while studying, but other students prefer to attend universities in other cities. Do the benefits of living away from home outweigh the disadvantages?
In many nations, some university students stay with their families, while others leave their home to study in other cities. This essay will first discuss about how living separated from the family while studying means students do not get support from them and then talk about how it can make them more focus on their studies and more independent before coming to the conclusion that the benefit of this outweigh the drawback.
8.5
band
You are planning to go and study English at a school overseas. You would like some information about their courses. Write a letter to the school. In your letter Ask about the school Say what kind of accommodation you want Mention any special request you have (for example diet).
I am writing this letter in regard to my intention to join your school for English learning programme and related to that I have some query.

The number of overweight children in developed countries is increasing. Some people think that it is due to problems such as the growing number of fast food outlets. Others believed that parents are to blame for not looking after their children’s health. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people say that schools should concentrate on teaching students academic subjects that will be useful for their future careers. Other say that subjects such as music and sports are also necessary. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Some people say that older, more traditional buildings in cities should be preserved. Others believe that these buildings should be demolished and new ones built in their place. Discuss both these views and give your opinion.

In many countries, there is shortage of housing due to growing population. Some people argue that new towns should be built in the country side, others argue for the regeneration of cities. What are the advantages and disadvantages of building new towns in the country?

In many countries, some students live with their families while studying, but other students prefer to attend universities in other cities. Do the benefits of living away from home outweigh the disadvantages?

You are planning to go and study English at a school overseas. You would like some information about their courses. Write a letter to the school. In your letter Ask about the school Say what kind of accommodation you want Mention any special request you have (for example diet).