Some people say that the best way to improve public health is by increasing the numbers of sports facilities. Others, however, say that this would have little effect on public health and that other measures are required. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
The importance of using
sports
Use synonyms
to improve public
Correct your spelling
health
haealth
Correct your spelling
health
is always debatable where many individuals
claiming
Wrong verb form
claim
show examples
that advancing
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
sports
Use synonyms
facilities
Use synonyms
good
health
Use synonyms
.while other believe
games
Use synonyms
has
Change the verb form
have
show examples
only
minor
Correct article usage
a minor
show examples
effect on
peoples
Change noun form
people's
show examples
health
Use synonyms
.The substantial influence of
this
Linking Words
trend has sparked
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
controversy
Change preposition
about
show examples
the
Correct your spelling
potential
potentail
Correct your spelling
potential
impact in the recent year .In
this
Linking Words
essay
Add a comma
,essay
show examples
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
will elaborate
both
Change preposition
on both
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
statements and
also
Linking Words
share my opinion
upon
Change preposition
on
show examples
the above statements Analyzing the statement , the
first
Linking Words
reason
emhancing
Correct your spelling
enhancing
more
sports
Use synonyms
facilities
Use synonyms
help the people to boost their power and
also
Linking Words
faclitates
Correct your spelling
facilitates
good looks as well as great personality which help them to easily suffer in bad working
enviornment
Correct your spelling
environment
.
Nowdays
Correct the word
Nowadays
show examples
for getting a good job
persons
Change noun form
person's
show examples
power personality and looks are judged.
In
Change preposition
For
show examples
instance , the
kerala
Change the capitalization
Kerala
show examples
police
has
Change the verb form
have
show examples
made a rule that every
person
Use synonyms
needs to be fit
for
Change preposition
to
show examples
get
Change the verb form
getting
show examples
permotion
Correct your spelling
promotion
permission
if they have
belly
Add an article
a belly
show examples
and low energy to do
task
Add an article
the task
a task
show examples
they did not get
further
Linking Words
beneficial services.
Moreover
Linking Words
, it
Linking Words
also
Add a missing verb
is also
show examples
beneficial to resolve
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
health
Use synonyms
issues .in
modern
Correct article usage
the modern
show examples
era every
person
Use synonyms
is suffer
Change the verb form
is suffering
show examples
from
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
harmful
disease
Fix the agreement mistake
diseases
show examples
like asthma ,cancer, obesity, pcod etc .people can only
safe
Replace the word
save
show examples
ourself
Correct pronoun usage
themselves
show examples
from these problems by playing
games
Use synonyms
so increasing the
facilities
Use synonyms
of
sports
Use synonyms
has
a
Correct the article-noun agreement
apply
show examples
numerous advantages.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, boosting the
facilities
Use synonyms
of
Change preposition
for
show examples
sports
Use synonyms
has some demerits .It creates a lot of
health
Use synonyms
problems
like
Correct word choice
and
show examples
it
Correct your spelling
is
show examples
harmful
Add a missing verb
is harmful
show examples
for
Change preposition
to
show examples
bones .the people who play
games
Use synonyms
in
Change preposition
at
show examples
high
Correct article usage
a high
show examples
level face the problem of pain backbone and legs with
this
Linking Words
they feel tired
whole
Correct article usage
the whole
show examples
day .
some time
Correct your spelling
Sometimes
show examples
playing
a
Correct article usage
the
show examples
wrong game made a gap between our bones. so these are some flaws that
Correct your spelling
affect
show examples
effect
Correct your spelling
affect
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
public
health
Use synonyms
. In my opinion , improving the level of
sports
Use synonyms
is very
Correct your spelling
beneficial
benficial
Correct your spelling
beneficial
it has various
advantageous
Replace the word
advantages
show examples
which save
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
society from many problems and
also
Linking Words
for getting a good body and to get good looks the
person
Use synonyms
must
me
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
rely on
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
sports
Use synonyms
.
nowdays
Correct the word
nowadays
show examples
,
Use synonyms
person
Add an article
a person
the person
show examples
needs a strong body to do a lot of work and
safe
Replace the word
save
show examples
the
person
Use synonyms
from the problem of stress and
Correct your spelling
depression
dipression
Correct your spelling
depression
In conclusion , there are only some effects but the
advantageous
Replace the word
advantages
show examples
are high so improving the level of
games
Use synonyms
is
good
Add an article
a good
show examples
step to improvise
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
society.
Submitted by jogtabala987 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • sedentary lifestyle
  • inclusive fitness
  • public health campaigns
  • lifestyle diseases
  • preventative health measures
  • health infrastructure
  • wellness initiatives
  • nutritional education
  • health-conscious
  • behavioural change
  • motivational outreach
  • physical wellbeing
  • cross-sectional collaboration
  • government subsidies
  • public health policy
What to do next:
Look at other essays: