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Some people think that it is important to use leisure time for activities that improve the mind, such as reading and doing word puzzles. Other people feel that it is important to rest the mind during leisure time

#people #leisure #time #activities #mind #word #puzzles #rest
Many people contend that spare
time
 is an essential need for
a
Correct article usage
the
show examples
 human
brain
. Leisure
time
 can be spent well by doing various activities,
evidence
Wrong verb form
evidenced
show examples
 in
this
 matter by reading and working on puzzles, whilst certain others think that it is significant to relax your
mind
 during leisure
time
. In my opinion, leisure
time
 can be considered according to the individual’s preference.
First
 of foremost, after a very hectic day or
week
Add a comma
,week
show examples
 it is necessary that the
mind
 requires an adequate break. Continuity of
work
 without a break may affect your
brain
 and it can lead to various diseases or non-communicable diseases
such
 as stress, anxiety and so on. Enhancing your knowledge during spare
time
 can consider
as
Change preposition
apply
show examples
an exercise
to
Change preposition
for
show examples
 the
brain
,
however
Add a comma
,however
show examples
 some
says
Change the verb form
say
show examples
 when the
mind
 needs
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
rest it defines as no
work
. Some people prefer short breaks, they utilize
the
Change the word
their
show examples
 spare
time
 to
work
 on their hobbies, whereas many individuals take a break completely from
workplace
Correct article usage
the workplace
show examples
,
housework
Correct word choice
and housework
show examples
, where they intend to travel locally or overseas on vacation.
Secondly
, in
this
 context when we elaborate on the benefits when the human
brain
 gets a sufficient break from
chaos
Add an article
the chaos
show examples
, the
mind
 becomes clear, it enables
user
Add an article
the user
a user
show examples
 to think straight, motivates the person, and gives a fresh
mind
, which
thereafter
 encourages the person to
work
 better. In conclusion, as far as I am concerned,
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
spare
time
 can be measured according to
individual’s
Correct article usage
an individual’s
show examples
 preference, it could be either for a short or long break as long as the
brain
 obtains enough relaxation.
Submitted by nayomi28 on

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • cognitive abilities
  • mental stagnation
  • intellectually stimulating
  • relaxation
  • meditation
  • stress reduction
  • overall well-being
  • personal development
  • life satisfaction
  • sense of achievement
  • emotional balance
  • peace of mind
  • scientific evidence
  • memory
  • learning
  • creativity
  • emotional regulation
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