Some people think travelling abroad is a valuable experience for young people. Others think it wastes too much time and expense. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#people #wastes #time #expense

Today in the world of

people

who seek

Add an article

show examples

new

place

Fix the agreement mistake

places

show examples

to travel. The juvenile

people

who love to travel outside their own countries for more way memories. While others suppose that they can lose money and spend more days. I would argue that juniors should go outside to find the other world in their own way. On one hand, the travelling of young

people

going to other countries explore their

life

value time.

Firstly

there is the

life

age range to learn something new.

Moreover

, when they meet

people

or new cultures different from they live that might give some inspiration back. For ,example new experiences with foods which they try once at the local restaurant will inspire and north them to be a chef. While other languages could attract them to be interested in studying diplomacy.

On the other hand

, the cost of travelling may a big problem for some families. When going outside everything is

Change preposition

at a

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cost. ,

Change the punctuation

apply

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Furthermore

Add a comma

,Furthermore

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some young

people

choose to stop their student

life

when they have gone outside and have trapped from the temptation which they got and can lose the time to treat their health form injured they got. For ,stant some

people

stay in the hospital between trips from food poisoning and some

people

may move out and get married to the rural girl whom they met. In conclusion, even going to foreign countries can lose time and money but in my opinion, I suppose that these more positive to make their

life

experience that can not replace by anything

Submitted by vanil on Tue Sep 06 2022

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Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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4Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
5Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

258 words

5.50

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.5

Complete response

5.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Some people think travelling abroad is a valuable experience for young people. Others think it wastes too much time and expense. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Fully explain your ideas

today,the high sales of popular consumer goods reflect the power of advertising and not real needs of the society in witch they are sold. to what extend do you agree or disagree?

With the increasing demand for energy sources of oil and gas, people should look for sources of oil and gas in remote and untouched natural places. Do the advantages outweigh disadvantages of damaging such areas?

It is fact that the majority of people who are sent to prison commit further crime after their release. What causing this? What can be done to change this?

In many countries, childhood obesity is a growing problem. What are the reasons for this and what can individuals and governments do to tackle the problem? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant experience from your own experience. Write at least 250 words.

Nowadays technology is increasingly being used to monitor what people are saying and doing (for example, through cellphone tracking and security cameras).In many cases,the people being monitored are unaware that this is happening.