IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7.5

Some people believe that educational success depends on good teachers, while others believe that students' attitudes are important. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#people #success #teachers #students #attitudes
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
With the advancement of the educational
system
Use synonyms
, few people reckon that educational success depends on a better team. Whereas, other percentiles of the crowd believe that learners' attitudes are imperative. Both views have their own reasons
such
Linking Words
 as
discipline
Use synonyms
 and a good sense of humour, which will be discussed in impending paragraphs. To commence with, there are multifarious reasons why the community thinks that good staff are responsible for the success of information.
First
Linking Words
 and foremost, the majority of the workforce is friendly in nature. To elucidate, in the contemporary epoch, most teachers do not behave rudely toward trainees because of some strict rules, are made by the government.
Hence
Linking Words
, due to changes in the behaviour of tutors towards juveniles, the
education
Use synonyms
 rule is moving in a good direction.
For instance
Linking Words
, a survey has been conducted on 1000 tutors in the U.S in 2018, which articulated that 71% of teachers have a good sense of humour.
On the contrary
Linking Words
, there are certain groups of folk who vehemently contend that
students
Use synonyms
' attitudes are a must for improvement in the
system
Use synonyms
 of
education
Use synonyms
. Primarily, trainees should be in
discipline
Use synonyms
. To explicate, in order to take the educational
system
Use synonyms
 towards success,
students
Use synonyms
 must maintain their
discipline
Use synonyms
 level during their school period, resulting in lucrative grades of them in their exams.
This
Linking Words
 would not only helpful in advancement in
education
Use synonyms
, but
also
Linking Words
 in the creation of numerous good
students
Use synonyms
. To cite an example, 65% of trainees who are living in Canada, are good in nature due to which the
education
Use synonyms
system
Use synonyms
 of that nation is taken as the best one all over the globe. To sum up, by analysing both views, I am of the opinion that
students
Use synonyms
' attitudes should be taken as an imperative step to make a better
education
Use synonyms
system
Use synonyms
 due to various reasons
such
Linking Words
 as
discipline
Use synonyms
 rather than the good behaviour of tutors as teachers all over the world are good in nature.
Submitted by harry.intellistall on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: