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Band 7.5

A government has a responsibility to its citizens to ensure their safety Therefore, some people think that government should increase spending on defense but spend less on social benefits. To what extent you agree?

#government #responsibility #citizens #safety #people #defense
Citizens'
safety
 and welfare all rely on the government's policies. At the same time, some propose that administrators invest more money in national defences to protect civilians and decrease spending on citizens' welfare. But, in my opinion, I believe the funds that are invested in military forces and social benefits so be equalized. Admittedly, spending more money to handle national
safety
 problems could help combat terrorists and earn respect from neighbouring
countries
. In modern society, terrorism is the biggest threat to most
countries
.
For instance
, Iran and its people have been suffering from terrorist attacks and bombings for years. But their funds for soldiers and weapons are far behind other big
countries
,
such
 as America or China, which give a reason for the terrorists to attack Iran without fear. Because their firearms and equipment can compete with Iran's solider,
on the other hand
,
countries
 like North Korea have invested numerous capital in nuking weapons,
thus
 gaining authority from the world. Which makes nations afraid to make moves on North Korea or try to partner with them. Despite these arguments, I still believe not all money should be devoted to national security, and half of the funds should be divided into medical and education. Since part of public finance are citizens' taxes, they have the right to experience the full benefit of educational and medical systems. To illustrate, the Hong Kong government has imposed a policy for local students to have a 12-years-guarantee of free education. With the complete welfare of academic and medical care, it will be attribution and consideration for immigrants to immigrate, encouraging more immigrants to contribute to the
countries
 and enhance economic growth. To conclude, the governments should equally distribute capital on national
safety
 problems and social benefits to provide
safety
 and aid to the residents.
Submitted by jackyyung0613 on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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