Some people believe that the best way to increase the road safety is to increase the minimum legal age for driving cars. To what extent do you agree?

It is often argued that the most efficient way by which
road
safety
can be
maximize d
Correct your spelling
maximized
show examples
, is to increase the
age
limit for driving. I,
however
, believe that it is a good solution,but
road
safety
can be ensured by imposing huge fines and strict laws and will provide my views in the upcoming paragraphs.
To begin
with, increasing the legal
age
for driving will result in less traffic on the roads.
Thus
,there will be more
matured
Replace the word
mature
show examples
drivers which ultimately will reduce
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
road
accidents.To exemplify,a recent survey by Delhi Traffic Police shows that in the year 2019, almost 63% of total
road
fatalities were caused because of the negligence of teenagers. Driving requires quick actions and consciousness while younger people are not capable enough to take immediate action.
However
,the main reason behind the
road
casualties is the traffic law breakers. People do not follow rules and often drive cars
overspread
Add the particle
to overspread
show examples
which causes
road
incidents. To reduce the problem,
long term
Add a hyphen
long-term
show examples
imprisonment and heavy fines should be more helpful.In New York,
for instance
, anyone driving
vehicle
Add an article
a vehicle
the vehicle
show examples
over
speed
Add an article
the speed
show examples
limit is punished with
six month
Add a hyphen
six-month
show examples
imprisonment.
Hence
, people became more cautious while driving which obviously
make
Correct subject-verb agreement
makes
show examples
the roads safer . In conclusion, not only the increment to the specified
age
limit to
drive
Add a comma
,drive
show examples
vehicle
Fix the agreement mistake
vehicles
show examples
can improve the
safety
on
road
, but
also
imposing the laws strictly and charging hefty
amount
Fix the agreement mistake
amounts
show examples
as fines from the law offenders can be more advantageous.Henceforth,along with increasing
legal
Correct article usage
the legal
show examples
age
, other
safety
measures like strict punishment should
also
be considered.
Submitted by Pablagurseerat on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
What to do next:
Look at other essays: