IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 1.5

Some people believe that professionals, such as doctors and engineers,should be required to work in the country where they did their training. Others believe they should be free to work in another country if they wish. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

#people #professionals #doctors #engineers #work #country
The bar chart compares the percentage of household’s weekly expenditure
in
Change preposition
for
show examples
 different purposes between 1968 and 2018. It is obvious that families spend by far the highest proportion of spending on food in 1968, standing at 35%. While, fuel and power accounted for the least percentage of average weekly expenditure among all the categories, which
is
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
had only 6%.
Similarly
 , the average spending on other purposes,
such
 as personal goods, transport and leisure
represents
Change the verb form
represent
show examples
 under 10%. We can see the weekly expenditure on housing, transport and leisure represent
relatively
Correct article usage
a relatively
show examples
 higher percentage in 2018 than the cost in 1968. Especially
on
Change preposition
for
show examples
 leisure purposes, making up
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
over 20%, which is the largest proportion among the other types in 2018.
In addition
, families took the same spending(7%) on household goods over the 40-year period.
Submitted by dona32939 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • professionals
  • doctors
  • engineers
  • required
  • training
  • home country
  • cultural
  • linguistic
  • advantages
  • economic impact
  • free
  • another country
  • globalization
  • international collaboration
  • improving
  • skills
  • knowledge
  • experience
  • opinion
What to do next:
Look at other essays: