IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 2.5

Some people think that governments should spend money on railways. Others believe that there should be more investment into new roads. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.

#people #governments #money #railways #investment #roads
The given table demonstrates the average
time
 that
spend
Change the verb form
spends
show examples
 on various daily activities by
males
 and
female
Fix the agreement mistake
females
show examples
 in the UK, separately. Overall, it is noticeable that both
male
Fix the agreement mistake
males
show examples
 and
female
Fix the agreement mistake
females
show examples
 spend
time
 the most on sleeping, whereas the amount of
time
that
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
used
Add a missing verb
is used
show examples
to
Change preposition
on
show examples
 sport is the least.
In addition
, a great disparity
of
Change preposition
in
show examples
time
 can be seen in the category of
Correct your spelling
housework
show examples
house work
Correct your spelling
housework
show examples
. Looking
first
 at sleep and leisure, the
time
 that men and women spend
on
Change preposition
apply
show examples
sleeping, at 8.04
hours
 and 8.18
hours
, is the highest among all activities. The average hour
that
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
spent on different
leisures
Fix the agreement mistake
leisure
show examples
 by
males
 and females are relatively similar, whereas
males
shows
Change the verb form
show
show examples
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 higher amount of
time
 on total leisure, at 5.25,
where
Correct word choice
while
show examples
 women have about 4.53. Moving onto the category of employment and study,
Correct your spelling
housework
show examples
house work
Correct your spelling
housework
show examples
 and childcare, a marked gap can be seen in these activities. The average
time
 male spend on employment and study, at 3.45
hours
, is higher than that of women, at 4.53;
however
, with regard to doing chores and caring
children
Change preposition
for children
show examples
, females show over a doubled amount of
time
than
Change preposition
as
show examples
males
. Females spent 3
hours
 and 0.32
hours
 on housework and childcare, whereas
males
 spent merely 1.41hours and 0.15
hours
 a day.
Submitted by erichappykimo on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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