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Writing Samples
Band 5.5

Some people think children have the freedom to make mistakes, while other people believe that adults should prevent children from making mistakes. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

#people #children #freedom #mistakes #adults
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Some
people
 think that
children
 should be allowed to make and learn from
mistakes
, while other
people
 believe that
adults’
Change noun form
adults
show examples
 intervention is needed to prevent these
mistakes
. According to some
people
,
mistakes
 are unavoidable and learning from the mistake is a valuable experience in life. After making
mistakes
,
children
 can learn to reflect on their actions and remedy the situations. In
this
 process, they develop important characteristics
such
 as independence and resilience.
By contrast
, if
children
 always live under the protection of
parents
Correct pronoun usage
their parents
show examples
, they are deprived of the opportunity to learn and grow. Once confronted with setbacks and failures in their adulthood, they become disheartened without the right attitude and strategy to handle these.
However
, some
people
 argue that learning from
mistakes
 is not necessary and
mistakes
 should be avoided with parental guidance in place. Every time
children
 make
mistakes
 they are paying a price for that, and some prices are too high to afford. As the guardian of
children
, parents have the responsibility to prevent
children
 from making
such
mistakes
. For some
children
 who intend to play truant or imitate dangerous
behavior
Change the spelling
behaviour
show examples
, parents should stop them and make them realize the consequence, rather than letting them learn from
mistakes
 on their own. In my point of view, it is unlikely that individuals can make no errors throughout their lives;
therefore
, allowing
children
 to learn from
mistakes
 and recover from setbacks is beneficial to their growth. Of course, the severity and frequency of the
mistakes
 need to be supervised. A certain degree of guidance from adults is necessary, but overprotection should not be encouraged.
Submitted by 634322896 on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • freedom to make mistakes
  • critical thinking skills
  • lifelong learning
  • guided learning environment
  • resilience
  • independence
  • overprotective
  • dependency
  • problem-solving skills
  • confidence
  • negative consequences
  • learning process
  • personal growth
  • trial and error
  • balance safety and learning
  • development
  • support and guidance
  • empowerment
  • risk-taking
  • life lessons
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