It has been suggested that primary children should learn how to grow vegetables and keep animals. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages?

#children #vegetables #animals #outweigh

I strongly believe that learning to grow vegetables and inhabiting

animals

at an early stage by children is beneficial for their overall growth and would result in the betterment of society. With the advancement in technology, we have almost forgotten our older ways to get vegetables and dairy products for our daily needs. Easy access to supermarkets has reduced the value of learning to grow vegetables and inhabiting cattle,

cows

Correct word choice

and cows

show examples

which used to be the main source of milk in earlier times. Today, everything is readily available at our doorsteps that we have almost forgotten the real source of our food items. Spreading awareness regarding the same is of utmost importance for future generations to come.

For example

: practising sowing seeds into the ground and watering them daily will not only bind kids with our historical values but

also

help them to understand the importance of life. Watching a seed grow into a whole vegetable is a beautiful process altogether.

On the other hand

, feeding

animals

and taking care of them will help nurture the feeling of love and togetherness. These types of learning will ensure that children will not hurt

animals

and plants in the coming years which is indeed a positive sign for the whole community.

Therefore

, we conclude that

nonetheless

other aspects of life are vital to

learn

Change the verb form

learning

show examples

but at the same time educating children regarding

growing

Add an article

the growing

show examples

Change preposition

apply

show examples

vegetable

Fix the agreement mistake

vegetables

show examples

and keeping

animals

is of utmost importance.

Submitted by cshivam2675 on Thu Sep 15 2022

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Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

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5Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
5Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

239 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.5

Complete response

5.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

primary children
grow vegetables
keep animals
advantages
disadvantages
practical skills development
environmental awareness
health benefits
instilling responsibility
learning about food production
time commitment
maintenance costs
safety concerns
curriculum constraints
limited resources

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It has been suggested that primary children should learn how to grow vegetables and keep animals. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages?

Fully explain your ideas

Currently, majority of people are willing to travel around the world to visit the sight seeying places because it is much more easier now as apposed to past. There are several benefits of tourism and there are outweigh the drawbacks.

Many manufactured food and drink products contain high levels of sugar, which causes many health problems. Sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar. Do you agree or disagree?

People who do not use social media networks* will always fall behind in career development opportunities. To what extent do you feel that this is an accurate and important prediction?

The diagramm below illustrate how recylced paper is made.

Differences between countries are becoming less evident. Nowadays people are watching the same films, brands, advertisements and TV channels. To what extent do the disadvantages of this outweigh the advanatges?