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Writing Samples
Band 7.5

Are famous people treated unfairly by the media? Should they be given more privacy, or is the price of their fame an invasion into their private life? Discuss both these views and give your own opinion. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your knowledge or experience

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The ultimate combination of social
media
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 and camera and smartphone technology leads to the creation of celebrity and influencer cultures of today. While a lot of
people
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 received fame and money from being popular on social
media
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 and the internet, It
also
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 brought negative effects on their
lives
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. In my point of view, despite being public figures, they should not be obligated to share every detail of their private
lives
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 with the public. Even though the craze for popular
people
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 like artists, models, and celebrities is not a new thing. The invention of social
media
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 has almost redefined celebrity culture. Nowadays, public figures cannot go anywhere without the paparazzi following them. Every detail of their
lives
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 is shared with the public.
For example
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, details of their families, friends, and lovers. Their backgrounds and upbringings.
People
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 they followed on Instagram and posts they liked on Twitter. Every detail and decision of their
lives
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 are being eyed and judged by the public. The fact that they are constantly being criticized by
people
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 every minute of their
lives
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 can greatly affect their mental health. As we have seen how a lot of famous
people
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 have suffered from depression and mental disorders and had to hiatus from work or even worse, rely on drugs and alcohol to cope with their conditions.
Furthermore
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, celebrities sharing every bit of their
lives
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 on the internet can have a bad influence on
people
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, especially kids and teenagers because how it can create unrealistic standards ranging from physical appearances to lifestyles.
As a result
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,
people
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 who follow them can feel dissatisfied and discontent with their own conditions.
For example
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, the Kardashians are very famous for sharing their
lives
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 with the public and making huge profits for being
media
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 personnel. Their unrealistic beauty standards have influenced a lot of teenagers who idolized them, which led to them spending money on plastic surgeries to change their appearances to resemble the Kardashians. In conclusion, It is undeniable that to be a public figure, your personal life must be known to the public to some extent.
However
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, it does not mean that celebrities should have their privacy invaded as a price for their fame because it can lead to undesirable results for both themselves and
people
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 who are influenced by them.

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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