IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Social media has become a very effective method of communication. At the same time, there is concern about its impact on individual and society. Do the advantages of social media outweigh the disadvantage?

Nowadays, Social
media
Use synonyms
 has become a popular way to communicate with someone.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, there are controversial problems that impact
on
Change preposition
apply
show examples
individual
Fix the agreement mistake
individuals
show examples
 and society. In
this
Linking Words
 essay, I discuss
profit
Correct article usage
the profit
show examples
 and drawbacks of the usage of social
media
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. The main profit of using social
media
Use synonyms
 is the
usefulness
Replace the word
use
show examples
 of instant communication with someone. If a person who lives in Japan posts an opinion on his Twitter, he could receive replies from all over the world. Anonymity is
also
Linking Words
 a feature of social
media
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, and it makes it easier to express
opinions
Correct article usage
the opinions
show examples
 of
people
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. These features not only make
more
Add an article
the more
a more
show examples
 active discussion about political or social issues
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 but
also
Linking Words
 contribute positively joining to
politics
Correct article usage
the politics
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 of young
people
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. Because
young
Correct article usage
the young
show examples
 generation is the main user of social
media
Use synonyms
, they can collect various information related to social topics.
However
Linking Words
, it can say offensive comments to a specific person,
for example
Linking Words
, actors, athletes and models,
is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
show examples
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 huge problem
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
 social
media
Use synonyms
. Anonymity escalates to
express
Wrong verb form
expressing
show examples
 excessive opinions to
such
Linking Words
 a person, and it will disturb their private lives and mental health.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, the widespread of picture-based social
media
Use synonyms
, the lookism that leads to eating disorders and some physical issues
is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
show examples
 common among adolescent students.
Also
Linking Words
,
people
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 who tend to spend too much time on social
media
Use synonyms
 sometimes are addicted to it, and they lose concentration and willingness in daily life. In recent days, social
media
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 is a general tool for many
people
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, and it has both advantages and disadvantages. While some
people
Use synonyms
 have
interest
Correct article usage
an interest
show examples
 in politics and social problems through the usage of social
media
Use synonyms
, others are troubled by aggressive posts, excessive lookism, and addiction to it. In my opinion, profit
beyond
Add a missing verb
is beyond
show examples
 drawbacks now, but social
media
Use synonyms
 enterprises should make better rules for using social
media
Use synonyms
 to improve the situation.

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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