IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

Some people think that museums should be enjoyable places to entertain people while others believe that the purpose of museum is to educate. Discuss both views and give you own opinion.

#people #museums #places #purpose #museum
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Over the past few decades, a controversial debate has been arising on the issue of
Museums
Use synonyms
,some people say that it is a
place
Use synonyms
 for
entertainment
Use synonyms
 whereas others strongly say that it is for knowledge sharing.As far as I am concerned,
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
museums
Use synonyms
 should be a
place
Use synonyms
 for both
entertainment
Use synonyms
 and education as well. In the arsenal of arguments supporting some people's perspective on
Correct article usage
the Museum
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Museum
Fix the agreement mistake
museums
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 as a
place
Use synonyms
 of gathering knowledge,one of the most potent is its ethnicity is valued and preserved for
this
Linking Words
 generation as well
to
Change preposition
for
show examples
 the upcoming generations.One of the key points is that
museums
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 give us a clear picture of how our ancestors lived, the trials and tribulations they
had
Unnecessary verb
apply
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conquered,
the
Correct word choice
and the
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 values, and morals they followed throughout their life so on.Si according to them, it's a
place
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 where we should consider
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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as
Change preposition
apply
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dignified and respectful.
For instance
Linking Words
, Padmanabhapuram palace in the district of Trivandrum where the purity has been preserved .
on the other hand
Linking Words
 , others value
museums
Use synonyms
 as
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
place
Use synonyms
 of
entertainment
Use synonyms
 where they can get together and spend time for limitless fun activities.The key points they suggest are that in
this
Linking Words
 process of urbanisation, and busy scheduled lifestyle,places like
museums
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 create a platform for the family to get to know each other and spend time on leisure activities.It
also
Linking Words
 gives an income to the government if they make it a
place
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 for
entertainment
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 .
For instance
Linking Words
, the palace of Kowdiyar is on the edge of providing both
entertainment
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 and education where it is being changed
as
Change preposition
into
show examples
 a township on the spot.
Finally
Linking Words
,I always value it for a mixture of both awareness and
entertainment
Use synonyms
.
Submitted by reji363 on

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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

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