Today, people are buying more consumer goods like jewelry and household appliances. Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

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Nowadays, many individuals tend to purchase more consumer products

such

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as jewellery and home appliances. In my opinion,

this

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emerging behaviour will bring more negative impacts on society.

This

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essay will discuss the pros and cons of

this

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buying trend.

Firstly

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, I will explain the positive aspects and will be followed by the negative aspects explanation.

To begin

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with, buying these kinds of stuff could make a person

becomes

Correct subject-verb agreement

become

show examples

happier for a certain time. Multiple studies explain that shopping

would bring

Wrong verb form

brings

show examples

a joyful feeling. People look more attractive with jewellery,

whereas

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sort of household appliances like microwaves, washing machines and vacuum cleaners would make domestic jobs easier to complete.

For example

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, my sister goes to the shopping mall every week as her way to release the stress level caused by her workload.

In addition

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, she said that after buying some consumer goods, her mood would be better for a

while

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Thus

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, buying these sorts of things could temporarily improve an individual's level of happiness. Despite its advantages,

this

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growing trend would bring negative effects. Usually, the price of these product categories is expensive.

Furthermore

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, people would lose their

saving fund

Fix the agreement mistake

savings funds

show examples

if they spend too much on luxurious things.

For instance

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, my friend who really loves to collect expensive goods had financial difficulties when emergencies like accidents happen. The hospital bill was much higher than his amount of savings,

then

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he could not get the best medication.

For

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this

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reason, over-consumption habits can negatively affect people's financial well-being.

To sum up

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, consumer goods product expenses could bring positive things to improve mood but

this

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habit brings some negative impacts on the financial health of an individual. The disadvantages were higher than the positive impacts. In my view, it is better to spend the money wisely.

evan.naratamaSun Sep 18 2022

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task response

Task Response: The essay adequately addresses the advantages and disadvantages of the increasing trend of purchasing consumer goods. However, the conclusion does not clearly state whether the advantages outweigh the disadvantages. It is important to clearly address the prompt and provide a balanced view on the topic.

coherence coherence

Coherence and Cohesion: The essay demonstrates a clear logical structure with a well-organized introduction and conclusion. The main points are supported with relevant examples. However, there is some repetition in the use of words and phrases. To improve coherence and cohesion, use a wider range of linking words and transition phrases to connect ideas and avoid repetition.

14
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

294 words

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Today, people are buying more consumer goods like jewelry and household appliances. Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

Nowadays, the way many people interact with each other has changed because of technology. In what ways has technology affected the types of relationships people make? Has this become a positive or negative development?

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