IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

In many developing countries there’s an increasing movement of workers from rural areas into the city Why do you think this happens? What problems can this cause?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
In the era of development and evolution,
people
Use synonyms
 living in rural areas might face difficulties and struggle due to the lack of technology in these areas.
Thus
Linking Words
, they start moving into the cities where the quality of living is considered better. In
this
Linking Words
 ,essay we’ll discuss the causes of
this
Linking Words
 phenomenon and its consequences.
Firstly
Linking Words
,
people
Use synonyms
 seeking a higher quality of life consider moving into the
city
Use synonyms
, since it provides its citizens with a better quality of living due to the presence of better infrastructures and educational systems.
This
Linking Words
 development made life more convenient and less demanding.
For instance
Linking Words
,
people
Use synonyms
 can move easily from one
city
Use synonyms
 to another by train,
thus
Linking Words
 crossing hundreds of kilometres in a few minutes,
however
Linking Words
, in urban areas they can barely find a car.
Secondly
Linking Words
, the job opportunities that the
city
Use synonyms
 provides are highly attractive,
therefore
Linking Words
, most
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
educated citizens move to the
city
Use synonyms
.
However
Linking Words
,
this
Linking Words
 can lead to a huge increase in the
city
Use synonyms
 population, leading to road traffic, and pollution, and raising the burden on the government as well.
For example
Linking Words
, hospitals might not be able to accommodate the number of patients, and as a ,result some of them can’t get proper medical care.
Moreover
Linking Words
, it’s more challenging to find a job with the huge number of applicants to the
city
Use synonyms
’s companies, leading to higher unemployment rates. To sum up, the cities are the centre of development and evolution,
thus
Linking Words
people
Use synonyms
 are attracted to move there seeking better chances of living,
nevertheless
Linking Words
,
this
Linking Words
 might lead to detrimental consequences
such
Linking Words
 as unemployment.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: