Shopping is the favourite free time activity for many young people today. Why do you think this has happened? Should young people be encouraged to do different activities in their free time rather than shopping?

#favourite #time #activity #people #activities

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İt is true that people between the ages of fifteen and thirty like buy some things for themselves these days. I think, there are a lot of reasons for

this

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situation and they need to

directed

Wrong verb form

direct

show examples

new pastimes. İf we examine, according to my experience,

firstly

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shopping is very easy at

this

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age because there are a number of options.

For example

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, you can use the internet and cities have plenty of shopping

centers

Change the spelling

centres

show examples

Secondly

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, İn ancient times, people had been need fewer clothes but nowadays every teenager doesn't want to wear the garment that they wore one day again so more purchasing is necessary.

finally

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, the most important cause about encourage guise for societies is advertisements, the shows by models and influencers make young enthusiastic. İn my opinion, we have to motivate communities to personal development by spending time. Especially students must use the time and money they spend on their looks for their education in

this

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way they will be more successful and have a better life.

Furthermore

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, we are supposed to push teenagers that look to phone screens all day to facilities of sport

otherwise

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after thirty years everywhere will full up unhealthy bodies.

Moreover

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, we may teach the workers adults that they can socialize without work or mall places. İn these days there are a lot of environments where can you meet new somebody. İn conclusion, communities are so much eager for seeming good. I mentioned above some causes of

this

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situation. there are steps

can

Correct pronoun usage

that can

show examples

be taken to tackle

this

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problem.

Submitted by emrekaanozkan01 on Tue Sep 20 2022

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8
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

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Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 9.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

256 words

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Shopping is the favourite free time activity for many young people today. Why do you think this has happened? Should young people be encouraged to do different activities in their free time rather than shopping?

You arranged to visit a friend in Canada but an important event at hame now means that you must change the dates of the visit. Write a letter to your friend. In your letter. -Explain the important event -Epologise for the situotion -Suggest a new arrangement

You came to know about a piece of equipment that would help you at your workplace. Write a letter to your manager. In your letter – describe the equipment – explain how it might be useful at your workplace – offer help in purchasing it

Your friend is coming to your country from abroad, but you can't go to pick him up at the airport. Write a letter to him/her and say -why you can't pick him up -suggest alternative ideas -talk about what he can do in your country

Nowadays we are producing more and more rubbish. Why do you think this is happening? What can governments do to help reduce the amount of rubbish produced?