Nowadays many people believe that in spite of the advances made in agriculture, many people around the world still go hungry. Why is this the case? What can be done about this problem?

it is true that starvation is still a big
problem
in many parts of the world
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despite
descpite
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despite
the high-tech
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devices
dvices
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devices
used in agriculture .
this
essay will discuss the two main factors causing
this
problem
.and the
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measures
mesures
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measures
that can be taken to solve it . one of the main
factor
Change to a plural noun
factors
show examples
for
hunger
is the unequal distribution of agricultural products .in other
term
Change the wording
terms
show examples
not
Add the comma(s)
,not
show examples
all
people
or areas get the same
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amount
amont
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amount
of the
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annual
anual
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annual
harvest .
this
can be either due to political issues or lack of solid
distrubutary
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distributary
system
for example
in south
sudan
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Sudan
show examples
people
go hungry
inspite
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in spite
of the
wealthness
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wealthiness
of their ground .
this
is because of of the internal conflicts and the politicals problems going on in there .the
seconed
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second
main
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reason
reaason
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reason
is lack of awareness ,in some
part
Fix the agreement mistake
parts
show examples
of the world
people
actually go
hungery
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hungry
because of their ignorance . one way to mitigate
this
problem
is building of a good
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delivery
delievery
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delivery
system that can reach
people
and
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especially
specialy
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specially
especially
the
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poor
poors
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poor
everywhere
for example
voluntary
Add an article
a voluntary
show examples
organization
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organizations
show examples
that
offer
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offers
show examples
a lot of help regarding
this
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these
show examples
issues .another way is to
sperate
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separate
show examples
politics from
people
Change noun form
people's
show examples
lives .wars and conflict have a
determenatal
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detrimental
consequences and it leads to poverty and
hunger
.
its
Replace the word
it's
it is
show examples
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definitely
deffintly
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definitely
unfair for
people
to suffer from
hunger
as a consequence of other
people
Change noun form
people's
show examples
behaviour .helding
an
Correct the article-noun agreement
awarness programmes
an awarness programme
show examples
awarness
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awareness
programmes
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specially
especially
specialy
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especially
for new mothers to teach them
Add the particle
to hoe
show examples
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how
show examples
hoe
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how
show examples
to properly feed their children is another way
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they
show examples
the
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they
show examples
can have a huge impact on
hunger
worldwide. in conclusion ,
this
essay talked about the main factor of starvations
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
and offers ways to mitigate
this
problem
Submitted by osama_elneel on

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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

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