Nowadays many people believe that in spite of the advances made in agriculture, many people around the world still go hungry. Why is this the case? What can be done about this problem?

it is true that starvation is still a big
problem
in many parts of the world
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despite

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descpite
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despite

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the high-tech
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devices

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dvices
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devices

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used in agriculture .
this
essay will discuss the two main factors causing
this
problem
.and the
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measures

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mesures
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measures

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that can be taken to solve it . one of the main
factor
Change to a plural noun
factors

The singular countable noun factor follows the quantifier one of, which requires a plural noun. Consider using a plural noun or a different quantifier.

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for
hunger
is the unequal distribution of agricultural products .in other
term
Change the wording
terms

The adjective other appears to be modifying the singular noun term. Consider making a change.

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not
Add the comma(s)
,not

It appears that you are missing a comma or two with the negative appositive not all people or areas. Consider adding the comma(s).

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all
people
or areas get the same
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amount

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amont
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amount

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of the
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annual

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anual
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annual

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harvest .
this
can be either due to political issues or lack of solid
distrubutary
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distributary

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system
for example
in south
sudan
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Sudan

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people
go hungry
inspite
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in spite

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of the
wealthness
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wealthiness

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of their ground .
this
is because of of the internal conflicts and the politicals problems going on in there .the
seconed
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second

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main
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reason

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reaason
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reason

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is lack of awareness ,in some
part
Fix the agreement mistake
parts

It seems that part may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

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of the world
people
actually go
hungery
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hungry

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because of their ignorance . one way to mitigate
this
problem
is building of a good
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delivery

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delievery
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delivery

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system that can reach
people
and
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especially

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specialy
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specially
especially

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the
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poor

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poors
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poor

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everywhere
for example
voluntary
Add an article
a voluntary

The noun phrase voluntary organization seems to be missing a determiner before it. Consider adding an article.

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organization
Fix the agreement mistake
organizations

It seems that organization may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

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that
offer
Change the verb form
offers

The verb offer does not seem to agree with the subject. Consider changing the verb form.

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a lot of help regarding
this
Correct determiner usage
these

It seems that determiner use may be incorrect here.

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issues .another way is to
sperate
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separate

The word sperate doesn’t seem to fit this context. Consider replacing it with a different one.

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politics from
people
Change noun form
people's

It seems that this noun form may be incorrect.

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lives .wars and conflict have a
determenatal
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detrimental

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consequences and it leads to poverty and
hunger
.
its
Replace the word
it's
it is

It appears that the possessive pronoun its should be a contraction instead. Consider changing it.

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definitely

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deffintly
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definitely

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unfair for
people
to suffer from
hunger
as a consequence of other
people
Change noun form
people's

It seems that this noun form may be incorrect.

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behaviour .helding
an
Correct the article-noun agreement
awarness programmes
an awarness programme

The indefinite article an may not be required with the plural noun programmes in this sentence. Consider removing the article, or changing the noun to singular.

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awarness
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awareness

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programmes
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specially
especially

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specialy
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especially

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for new mothers to teach them
Add the particle
to hoe

It appears that the verb hoe should be in the to-infinitive form. Consider adding the word to.

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how

The word hoe doesn’t seem to fit this context. Consider replacing it with a different one.

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hoe
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how

The word hoe doesn’t seem to fit this context. Consider replacing it with a different one.

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to properly feed their children is another way
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they

The word the doesn’t seem to fit this context. Consider replacing it with a different one.

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the
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they

The word the doesn’t seem to fit this context. Consider replacing it with a different one.

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can have a huge impact on
hunger
worldwide. in conclusion ,
this
essay talked about the main factor of starvations
,
Remove the comma
apply

It appears that you have an unnecessary comma in a compound predicate. Consider removing it.

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and offers ways to mitigate
this
problem
Submitted by osama_elneel on

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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

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