For Many people, the the reason they work hard is to earn more money. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

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In today's digital world, where every step of life has big competition, everyone wants to do hard
work
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and make a decent amount of money.
According to
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a large number of
people
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, men
work
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hard to earn more cash, I completely agree with the present statement and in the given essay, we are going to delve into
this
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further
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.
To begin
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with,
People
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endeavour themselves so that they can not only make wealth but
also
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get a reward from the senior managers or the owner.
For example
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, A lot of companies provide
people
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with special rewards if they
work
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very productive regularly.
Thus
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, in order to get that reward, employees do a lot of hard
work
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.
On the other hand
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, there is another factor of hard
work
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is that some employees are more passionate about their
work
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, and they do not get satisfied until they
work
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hard on their tasks.
Therefore
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, they constantly endeavour to make sure the tasks which are done by them are perfect.
for instance
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, a study has concluded that there is a positive link between feeling self-confidence and being successful in a task which requires working hard.
As a result
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, many
people
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give passionately their best in order to achieve a high level of confidence. In conclusion, many
people
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work
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hard
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due to
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for
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several reasons. I partly agree with the view that money is an important factor in the level of working hard, and
besides
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I believe that a sense of self-confidence and a passion for a job is an equally determinant factor.
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task response
Provide a more balanced view by discussing both sides of the argument.
coherence and cohesion
The essay lacks a clear and strong structure. Ensure that each paragraph has a clear central idea and that there is a clear progression of ideas throughout the essay.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • financial stability
  • necessities
  • monetary rewards
  • quality of life
  • luxury items
  • dependents
  • responsibility
  • pursue
  • personal interests
  • cultural pressures
  • wealth accumulation
  • fulfillment
  • visible measure
  • correlate
  • secure future
  • comfortable lifestyle
  • entertainment
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