IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 5.5

Some people think that drug addicts should be treated like criminals and sent to jail, while others believe that they should be treated like patients and sent hospital. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

#people #drug #addicts #criminals #jail #patients
Drug
 intake among the youth has increased at a fast pace in recent years. Many
people
 are of the view that
drug
addicts
 are
criminals
 and should be imprisoned.
On the other hand
, few believe that they should be sent to hospitals and that proper treatment should be provided.
This
 essay will discuss both the views and opine on the fact that not all
drug
addicts
 are
criminals
 and assistance should be provided to these
people
 like normal patients in some cases.
Firstly
, we need to pay attention to the fact that most of the crime these days is being conducted by
people
 who do not have fixed jobs, lack basic facilities and have poor family backgrounds. The majority of
such
 class of
people
 are found dealing drugs and eventually become
drug
addicts
. Society has fear these folks as they have been caught doing serious crimes like rape, assaulting women, stealing and much more.
Therefore
, we can say that most
criminals
 are
drug
addicts
 as well.
Hence
, it becomes necessary for the authorities to punish them and sent them to jail for the welfare of the general public.
On the contrary
, there is a fine line between
drug
addicts
 and
criminals
 in some places. There
also
 exists a class of
drug
addicts
 who have started taking cocaine, heroin etc
as a result
 of bad company, loss of families, unemployment etc and become habitual to it as it helped them release stress in the
first
 place. They do not harm society but use drugs as an antidote to their anxiety. These adults need help from our government by way of their proper treatment in hospitals so that they can get rid of
such
 a bad addiction and continue to live their life in a normal manner.
Hence
, we conclude that the government needs to understand the true identity of the
drug
addicts
 and
accordingly
 decide whether they need to be sent to prisons or health care centres.
Submitted by cshivam2675 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
What to do next:
Look at other essays: