Many parents these days work in other countries, taking their families with them. Do you think advantages of the development outweigh its disadvantages?

#parents #work #countries #families #development

Nowadays, some

parents

have opportunities to work abroad, and they take their

family

Fix the agreement mistake

families

show examples

with them. It can take them much time to deal with a new job and family settlement, and

also

cost them a lot with living expenses. In my opinion,

however

, the multitude of advantages that family members living with

parents

abroad vastly outweighs the limited

disadvantages

that it offers

Change preposition

apply

show examples

expat

Correct your spelling

ex-pat

show examples

parents

. Undoubtedly, there are some drawbacks which show significant effects on

families

with

parents

working abroad.

Firstly

Parents

need to spend more money on current expenses, particularly on

children

’s tuition, housing rent and family

traveling

Change the form of the verb

travel

show examples

expenses.

Although

there are perks of working abroad by partial companies, it is still a huge expense that

parents

should consider.

Second

parents

and

families

all face

life

exchanges,

culture

Replace the word

cultural

show examples

differences and language barriers when they live in a new country together.

Parents

need to adjust themselves to new jobs as soon as they can. Older family members try to build their social

life

in a new world.

For

Change preposition

Children

show examples

children

, they may learn a new language faster in

schools

Fix the agreement mistake

school

show examples

but they still have difficulties interacting with their peers and

feeling

Wrong verb form

feel

show examples

unsafe during a friendship in their school

life

Therefore

, these

disadvantages

may result in one parent inevitably needing to stay home to be the primary caretaker and will

thus

renounce any opportunity

Change preposition

for

show examples

employment and income. Despite the manifest

disadvantages

families

living abroad together, in

reality

Add a comma

,reality

show examples

most

parents

are well-planned with financial management and family care. In

this

regard

Add a comma

,regard

show examples

I firmly believe that the multitude of advantages decisively outweighs the minimal

disadvantages

potentially gained.

Parents

bring about strong effects and serve as

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

role

model

Fix the agreement mistake

models

show examples

Change preposition

for

show examples

children

’s

developments

Fix the agreement mistake

development

show examples

. When

parents

spend more time with their

children

, it benefits their

children

’s personalities. At the same time,

families

can help each other to get used to local

life

faster. Because

children

or older

families

interact with their peers or

neighbors

Change the spelling

neighbours

show examples

this

makes it easier for an immigrant family to make friends and join monthly activities in the local communities.

Lastly

, living in

this

globalization world, it is necessary for

children

to learn a

second

language and improve their adjustments

Change preposition

show examples

different cultural environments. In

this

process,

children

learn to respect different cultural

behaviors

Change the spelling

behaviours

show examples

, expand their horizons, and develop their own perspectives on

this

world. In conclusion, living abroad with family offers a superior experience through helping each other, good

developments

Fix the agreement mistake

development

show examples

children

and expanding

children

’s horizons. By means of a good living abroad plan each family member will be presented with benefits from it.

Submitted by hukaihsin99 on Fri Sep 23 2022

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

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Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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9Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
6Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
19Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

422 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Many parents these days work in other countries, taking their families with them. Do you think advantages of the development outweigh its disadvantages?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Nowadays, most children prefer to spend several hours playing with electronic devices over doing more traditional leisure activities. What problem does this cause? What do you think are possible solutions?

Childcare training courses should be mandatory for all parents. Do you agree or disagree with this statement? Give your own opinion and include relevant examples.