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Band 4.5

Many people believe that in order to have clean and tidy streets in their neighbourhood, this should be the residents's responsibility; while others think, it shoud be the government's duty. What is your opinion?

#people #streets #neighbourhood #residents #responsibility #shoud #government #duty
Nowadays, the number of
people
 in closed society including small neighbourhoods and towns increasing day after day,
,
Change the punctuation
apply
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accordingly
 social duties
varies
Correct subject-verb agreement
vary
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 and
changes
Correct subject-verb agreement
change
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 including the clean environment. While some
people
 argue that it's
residents'
Correct article usage
the residents'
show examples
 responsibility for each neighbourhood, others claim
this
 should be led by the
government
 as part of its responsibility, I believe that in most cases clean cities are
people
's duty.
Firstly
, I think having a clean
city
 shouldn't be subjected to a specific party, uncleaned streets will be developed to be
a
Correct article usage
apply
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dangerous
places
Correct the article-noun agreement
place
show examples
 full of disease and other harmful shapes,
,
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apply
show examples
accordingly
Add a comma
,accordingly
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 each person in his close society should be responsible for his own action, in my views we should think in
this
 as your home, if you don't always clean house and take
garbage
Add an article
the garbage
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 out, it will be ended having a bad and dangerous place to live in it.
Moreover
,
government
Add an article
the government
show examples
 is not always available to watch every single street including side streets and alleys, even if the local
city
 council is applying a tax to support
this
 service but it remains
residents'
Correct article usage
the residents'
show examples
 responsibility to report for unwilling actions committed by others to keep their
city
 clean, another thing to be considered that
government
 always takes some time to process complaints and act
accordingly
,
consequently
this
 will lead to the unorganized
city
.
Finally
, despite many claims and assumptions about
government's
Correct article usage
the government's
show examples
 role in cleaning neighbourhoods, I have never seen a clean
city
 without its own residents' support including in my home town. Taking everything into consideration,
i
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I
show examples
 would say that contemporary local management led by society should create awareness campaigns to have
Correct article usage
a
show examples
clean place including
people
 and the
government
 together.
Submitted by rehameldweik on

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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