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Writing Samples
Band 7

Poor nutrition and obesity is a problem in many developed countries and some people believe that a tax on fast food would reduce the problem. Do you agree?

#nutrition #obesity #countries #people #tax #food
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No one can deny that obesity and malnutrition are becoming more and more threats in some developed countries. The accelerating pace of life force
people
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 to be fed junk
food
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 or processed
foods
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. According to some
people
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, reform of the fast
food
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 taxation system may be a solution to deal with
such
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 problems. As far as I am concerned, a
tax
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 on them cannot abstain
people
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 from eating fast
foods
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 so I totally disagree with the statement.
To begin
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 with, it is highly important to understand that in today's conditions, eating processed or fast
food
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 is compulsory for the majority of
people
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 who have to attend
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
school or go to their job in the morning.
Such
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 workers and students, mostly have to wake up earlier and skip healthy breakfast. Eating fast
food
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,
such
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 as sandwiches and toast, on the road is the only solution for them. For
this
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 reason, increasing
tax
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 rates on these
foods
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 may restrict
such
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people
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 to reach them.
For instance
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, in Turkey, a
tax
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 policy was put into action by the government regarding products,
such
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 as alcohol and cigar, to reduce the percentage of consumption they push
people
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 to consume other illegal products rather than
Wrong verb form
reduce
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reducing
Correct pronoun usage
themreducing
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.
Instead
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 of an extra
tax
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 on unhealthy
foods
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, some other workable solutions can apply
such
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 as public announcements about the benefits of having a healthy diet or encouraging
people
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 so that they have a more mobile lifestyle. The former can be achieved readily by using public television channels or cooperating with well-known doctors.
Hence
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, public awareness of eating healthy and avoiding fast
food
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 can be aroused.
In addition
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, notifications popping up on the screen in the workplace at regular intervals may hearten workers to be more mobile. To sum up, changing peoples’ eating habits by educating and pushing them to be more mobile in order to burn calories which get fast
foods
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 are effective solutions rather than adding an extra charge on
foods
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. If sufficient awareness can be aroused, the rate of being overweight will reduce gradually.
Submitted by Oğuzhan Balcı on

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